CindyH8's Journal

I AM SOO FREAKING STUBBORN!!! Mood

Saturday, March 29, 2008

IF ONLY I COULD BE AS DETERMINED ABOUT NOT SMOKING AS I AM ABOUT SMOKING! WELL, SMOKING RELIEVES A CRAVING AND NOT SMOKING DOESN'T. I SEE THAT I MUST MAKE IT THROUGH A STRETCH OF DESSERT, ONCE I WALK OUT OF EGYPT, AND SIMPLY ENDURE SOME MISERY UNTIL THE PROMISED LAND APPEARS ON THE HORIZON! THE QUESTION I KEEP RETURNING TO IS WHY WAS IT SO EASY TO QUIT THE LAST TIME AND SO HARD NOW? I KNOW IT HAS TO BE A MIND SET. ARGH!

IN TERMS OF MY OTHER GOALS, FOR SOME REASON, GIVING UP THE CIGS MAKES THEM MUCH MORE ATTAINABLE! I AM MAKING PROGRESS BUT IT WOULD SURE START HAPPENING IF I FELT BETTER! I MUST ASK MYSELF IF I AM AFRAID OF SUCCEEDING, OR FEELING TO GUILTY TO BE GOOD TO ME? I STRUGGLE WITH SOME MAJOR STRONGHOLDS IN THESE AREAS. HEY, MAYBE I'M ON THE BRINK OF A WONDERFUL BREAKTHROUGH! MAYBE I'M ALREADY IN THE DESSERT AND TRYING TO TIP-TOE BACK TO EGYPT BECAUSE I'M INSECURE. MAYBE I'M ALREADY IN THE PROMISED LAND AND JUST DON'T KNOW IT!!!MAYBE I JUST NEED TO BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD! MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE I'M STALLING LIKE CRAZY WITH ALL THIS PSYCHO-BABBLE!!! HAHAHAHA

Hug CindyH8

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Comments

Remember...cigarettes need you, you don't need them. I started running when I quit and that motivated me to stay smoke free. I also put my goal on my page and found I feel more accountable to stay on track. I hope you find what works for you soon! Hugs, L.

InMyOwnSkin
YOU JUST TURN AROUND AND GET WALKING BACK INTO THE DESERT!!!!! AND DON'T FORGET THE WATER!!! I was so afraid to Breath Free (I use that instead of quit smoking) which is soooooooooooo crazy. Breath Free my friend. It takes strength but you can do it. Be good to yourself.

wils