Clementine16's Journal

Yesterday I tried to tell Calum that, maybe, a little time apart would do us some good. I'm only talking about an afternoon away from each other because I've spent the whole week with him and I'm scared of getting bored and annoyed with him, so I suggested him. But like I thought...he immediately thought that I wanted to break up with him and that we're drifting apart, when I actually think the exact opposite. I think that we're getting closer. And now that I've suggested time alone, he doesn't think that I love him and that we shouldn't live together. Turns out that tonight I'm going to see him, despite everything that I said to him. About loving and my insecurities and the future. But he seemed to totally ignore that part! I DO still love him. And this one afternoon apart has now turned into a whole WEEK apart!!! I'm not too bother with not being able to see him after school etc, but I am really disappointed that he doesn't think I love him. After the hundreds of times of me telling him that I do. I'm also annoyed about the whole living together thing. I still think we will, it's just the extremity of what he said to me. I'm starting to think that maybe it's not me that needs to learn to love. Maybe...(and I cant believe I'm suggesting this) it's him. On the other hand, I have now accepted that love and life has it's ups and downs and we have to continue no matter what happens and no matter what people think and say to us. We must be strong. And this is not only me. It's everyone. We have to be strong emotionally and spiritually so that we can learn to deal with all the obsticles in life. We have to be strong for ourselves and for everyone around us. We have to use our heads. Think about other people and not just ourselves. Think about how key decisions in our lives effect the people around us. WE MUST BE STRONG BECAUSE STRENGTH LEADS TO HAPPINESS! Try it. Becky xx