Sneshinka's Journal

it's so hard to be apart, he only been away a week now, but will be gone for probably two month. We do communicate and he does come on msn messanger with the webcam on, it makes it a lil easier but still just simply being apart its hard for me. At least he is staying with his family down their and has a place to live and working their. I just want him back... but it will take a bit of time. I have good days and bad days, lately though this whole week I been so emotional and tears come from no where really. They just come when they decide to come.

My parents and my sister went to hawaii this morning. I am just at home myself, so i will be coming here everyday updating whats going on.

Also, one of my good friends who is recovering addict, been clean three years. is going through a tough time with a relationship the girl who he is /was with is also my friend. So, I been their for him as well, so we been both emotional. I am telling him to be careful and not to push himself because he can relapse. it's his 1st love, who he loves so very much. She takes bunch of different meds for her anxiety depression that most likley not making it any better, but making her worse. her mood swings, personality etc... all are like changing. She broke up with him, but he is madly in love with her. So, I been staying by his side as well and we been tryi to support each other. I goto get goin to work .. any aadvice or comments welcome..

my fiance left to idaho sunday morning.....its sux but at the same time i am tryin to take and see things in a positive way. life is unpredictable and whatever it comes we goto be prepared for it and take it as it comes...

I still have my full time job and my lead teacher said she really enjoys and likes to work with me she said that today....which made me feel good and more positive. i goto take care of me that's the first, we goto be individuals and take of ourselves before we start taking care and loving the other. I been doing two things at once. I did get him and bail him out from jail with whatever money or resources i had. but i cant keep doin that .. it's like do the time then u wont have to worry about it. he been out since april 25th...   wel i got him out..

but again nothing ever works out and something always comes up..

so he went to idaho.. he has two warrants in WA.... just cause everything got messed up....

grrr courts systems suck.... they make me mad...

but anyways let me go back to positive things....

i got my job

i do babysitting on the side sometimes

i have my friends

i have a place to live

i do miss justin very much.. on top of it all he been clean since may 1st,,..... which i am very happy about.. i try to encourage him to stay clean.. i tell him positive things through out the day..

we get along awesome when he is clean.. we communicate

we care for each other

he has a job in idaho....but being apart is hard...

talkin on the phone helps...and hearing his voice in the morning helps bunches too

i have my crying time, i have my bad days.. we all do

but life goes on.. i guess we just goto be hopeful and have dreams

and believe....being positive and encouragin each other and supporting each other

that's what gets us through each and every day