fruitfly's Journal

Journal Entry for January 4, 2008 Mood

Friday, January 4, 2008

Ive been thinking and thinking about the letter and all,so much swirling around in my head,my FAMILY sitting around discusing me and attacking me as a person,then to basically say I make them sick and theyve had enough of me,its beyond my comprehension,I guess I thought family was supposed to be there thru thick and thin,guess I was wrong,its not like I do drugs,sell drugs,prostitute,drink like a fish,end up in jail,abuse the kids,teach the kids wrong things,all because of my past and my personal life Im being persecutted,Im not saying I dont have room for improvement and that Im not working on things and Im not making excuses but does anyone take into consideration how I was raised,the things Ive been thru that are no fault of my own,that I am in therapy,oh well I just feel as though theres nothing I can do at this point,basically just feel thrown to the curb,I dont trust any of them anymore,

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Comments

Family troubles can cut like a knife. You said it best in that family is 'supposed' to love you thru thick and thin... however, that isn't always the way it pans out. Hang in there, sometimes families also have a big blowout(to clear the air) and after a few days.... it'll work out. Let everyone cool off for a bit and then maybe ask to speak about it as adults. My family makes me nuts too sometimes, I think it's just par for the course.

aloneagain
I know you are feeling down right now, because like you said family should be there for you no matter what. I agree with aloneagain that maybe after everyone cools down a bit, you all may be able to sit down and talk about it as adults. I think if you tell them some of the things you wrote in your journal about what you are doing to take care of yourself, and that you're not perfect, you're going to have bumps in the road, but you are trying - I think that you may be able to work through this. Know that I am here for you, I'm thinking and praying for you. You are a strong woman and you will definitely get through!!!!!!! You've done it before you'll do it again!!!!

PSUgirl
thank you all for your comments,but my family knows that Im going to therapy as a matter of fact my son in law told me I didnt need it,they know that I journal and what not on here,they know how down Ive been ect.,they know what Im doing and going thru,thats why theyve done what theyve done,theyre tired of me,period.Its ok,life goes on,

fruitfly