blarney's Journal

It is hard to believe that it has been 4 weeks since I found out about my H's affair.  We have been to counselling together and individually.   It is very helpful to talk to my counselor since I have chosen not to tell anyone about the affair.   When I initially found out about the affair I felt completely lost and thought there was no way our marriage could continue.  For those just finding out about the affairs I can tell you that time does help you sort things out.   I have definitely calmed down and realized that my H has many problems that I was not aware of and  needs to work through them and this also applies to our marriage.  The thought of him cheating still hits me like a stun gun at times....mostly when I least expect it.  I know we will forever be changed, but like my counselor says..." you wouldn't want to go back to the way things were before."  Actually, I didn't think they were all that bad but I guess my husband did.  I can't say that I am hopeful yet, but I am not in that horrible state of shock that was with me for days.    They say what doesn't kill you will make you stronger...well... I will be a very muscular women when this is all over I can tell you that!!