special3's Journal

hummm,slip up? Mood

Saturday, July 19, 2008 | An Anxious story

As a friend and I were driving home,I noticed my H out and turning down the OW's street. We drove by and yup, there he was driving slowly past her house.

My heart raced and all those old emotions came flooding back!! Oh No,what is happening?? He was on his way to the golf course so I had hours to think about this before he came home! Of course, my mind was racing and went through all the scenario's. Why is he driving past her house? Does he care? What is happening?

Is it happpening,again? .....oh please NO!

I was so floored I knew I couldn't talk to him. So, I e mailed him my questions!

Went to bed and waited...he finally came home checked his mail, climbed in bed hugged me and said I got your message! He had noticed lots of activity at her house,(very small town)many cars and wondered what was happening. (She put her house up for sale this last winter) He was thinking,"YES,she's moving"! But, it was just a rummage sale! After I listened,did I lay into him....he understood, apologized! Said it was stupid and he won't DO THAT again! It made me realize,"whew,it doesn't take much to get me going again"!!! Talk about triggers!! Wow,how fragile am I ??? Good grief,get a grip! We're Good,all is Fine! WHEW!!

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Comments

I take it by reading this that the OW lives very close to you. And she was your good friend. Do you ever see her? After you found out about the affair, did you ever confront her or talk to her?
I know that everyday that my H has to drive home past OM's driveway he feels a stab. He wonders how he can ever feel trust completely when he knows how close the OM is.

ibex
ibex; Yes,she lives very close to us. We live in a "very" small town. Yes,we were close friends,also as couples,and our kids played together and were friends as they grew older. I have talked to her after dd,but she never apologized.(it was a"nice" talk,I even hugged her when I left) Before than,she only lied to me. She told me,"I will do whatever you want".. But,I asked her not to attend our daughters wedding,she did. I asked her not to come over or call my H,she did...stuff like that. needless to say,it was very interesting...its a long story!

faithnhealing; No,he did not get defensive. I guess he understood where I was coming from! (it wasn't always this way, he's healing,too!)

special3
I just noticed your journal entry, sorry for the late reply.
I don't think you are fragile at all. I think we all would have felt the same way.
UGH, gotta love small towns!

srsnde