whatisamom's Journal

been awhile since i wrote in my journal. don't want to now.  but here goes. hate my neighbors. nothings going right and i am sick of being taken advantage of and verbally abused. i would be happy to die.  i fail and fail and fail and i don't even care to try cause this is how it is. i just mess people's lives up and i am ready to go. no plans yet, but that is what i want. i wouldn't even want to live if i thought there was a chance for things to be happy because i am to tired. just like every cloud has it's silver lining every rainbow has it's end. happieness is just a tease. you can have it only for awhile.

i don't own a gun. i never suceed on ding with pills because there's to much time for animal instintcts of survival to kick in. can't get those vains just right. all i get from that is scars. i'm not good at ding either. so no plans yet and i won't let you know when there is because i don't want help. but if you read this and have suggestions on how to do it good and proper in a way that doesn't sound scary please have mercy on me and share.