AzureMoon's Journal

I have posted a little on here today, but I just am not up to much. Should I share what I consider to be overtly strange and suspicious to me despite my feeling like crap. Well, I had to go to the ER last night because I just was not able to pee. This had started slowly the day before, which is a complete opposite of my normal all day long ritual. So, I decided despite my best former experiences to go to the hospital before I became even more dehydrated. Let me just say the care at this hospital was horrible. It was horrendous, and other words I won't say. It was not like that the 1st time I went there. But This past week the folks there have their brains stuffed or hidden somewhere if you catch my drift. I am not ok right now. I am not going to try to pretend to be. I was a good patient and waited and two whole days. I took immodium which stopped the runs, but then on top of that I couldn't pee. I couldn't eat without getting worse gut, mostly right sided pain. Remember, my Ultrasound supposedly showed abnormalities on my kidneys, a fatty liver (mild) and a mass (a small one on one of my kidneys). Most of the pain I am having is where my kidneys are. It got to be too much yesterday and so did the nausea. By the time I got to the hospital it was about 10 pm, and we did not leave till 7 am. They didn't do much. The doctor wasn't even going to see me or tell me what was going on before I left. Basically they kept nagging me for a urine sample when I kept explaining I could not PEE. So they tried the catheter approach. Well Guess WHAT even after the first bag of fluid , I still coul d not pee with a catheter. It took another bolus of fluid before I could give them a sample, and of course this was with !!! THATS RIGHT FOLKS!!!! THE INFAMOUS CATHETER, Found at your Nearest ER FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE IF YOU ARE UNABLE TO PEE. They were happy because they got their clean catch. I got fluid and zofran via IV. Oh and they got their blood and pee, a great tradeoff I must say. My poor husband!. I was probably half out of my mind before I got anything in me. The doctor didn't even want to bother telling me the cat scan results from the test my PCP ordered at the same Hospital that monday. GUESS WHAT!. THE cat scan showed nothing! Nothing at all but a slightly contracted gallbladder whatever the heck that means. Oh but this is the same hospital that told me I had pneumonia, and then my ex pcp yelled at me for going to the ER and that my X RAY according to the radiologist was clear. This ER doc said Ultrasounds are not accurate at times, which I can understand, but I am still sick!I am in pain here and there and it is annoying me. I am fed up. I don't want to deal with this anymore. See, they love dangling a carrot in front of me then taking it away. It is cruel. It is so cruel to know and feel unwell but not get the help you need. So that is why I try to help others and started the little group. I feel like jumping off a bridge. I really do. God won't let me. GOD if you are up there listening I have a few gripes and requests too.

Please help my friend Kim get a new competent doctor.

Please help my friend Sparkly get a good competent doctor

Please help all my friends and loved ones get good competent doctors.

Please help me stay somewhat sane, because Lord I cannot do this anymore. I have said this, and I will pray and say it again. Lord, enough please help me!!!!!!!

Please give my husband the strength, wisdom, patience, and understanding and help him too with all the things he is struggling with. Lord Please help us both so we can see Kailey. Please let us win. You know what I am talking about.

God please take care of Frieda, and Glitter, and thank them and all the others for being there with funny jokes and helpfulness...and for Kim 's helpful msgs too

G0d please take these tears I am crying and use them for something better than my own suffering.

God please give me the strength to find reasons to go on.

God Let my heart not break anymore what good am I to you if I am broken.

Please let this kidney doctor that I saw only once be a light in the darkness. PLEASE.

Please help me to help others and to be always faithful.

Please help Theresa with her family issues and her sick little one

Please help me to deal with the financial burdens that are crushing us and help me to deal.

HELP ME GOD and HELP ALL THE OTHER FOLKS ON THIS BOARD in the best way you can and only you know.

Bring our soldiers home Lord, and please put our next president in office as one you would Choose yourself.

. Lord please comfort the sick and those in pain, and shed your mercy on all and bring the lost close to you.

. Thank you for listening to me complain and pray and whatever.

In Jesus name

AMEN