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It's about that time again. Ovulation time, that is. Time to start trying again. Last month I was all gung ho and excited about it, but this month, not so much. I'm feeling kind of apprehensive and scared, actually. If we don't get pregnant, I'll be depressed and sad. Last month, when I took that pregnancy test and it came back negative, I felt so empty and alone. I cried for an hour after. But, then, if we do get pregnant, I'll be scared beyond reason. I'm so scared of having another miscarriage. It just seems like there are so many women who keep having miscarriage after miscarriage for no apparent reason. Women just like me, who want a baby more than anything in the world, who would make wonderful mothers. I don't want to give up hope or start trying, but I'm scared. I'm scared I might never have kids. My husband keeps starting sentences with the words "when we have kids." And he just says it with such confidence, like he knows it's gonna happen. And every time I hear it, I feel just a tiny bit sad, cause I don't know it. I don't have that confidence. I wish I did, but I don't.
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I can't even tell you how much I feel the same way. I think it's a defense mechanism we use. We don't want to get too excited especially since we've had such disappointment in the past. Just try to stay positive. Best of luck!!!
trovi
I have the same feeling as you at times. Stay Strong! It will happen. Just take it one day at a time and try not to worry about tomorrow. Things are so scary if you are always thining about the future and what it could or could not bring. When you start to go beyond that, everything can make you anxious and I am learning that it is not worth getting worked up over. God does not want us to fear pregnancy. It is a blessing and ttc is a gift from God as well. Take care!
anxietyfree