lisalynn1111's Journal

Got a case of the f*** its today! Mood

Thursday, March 13, 2008 | A Venting story

Work is wearing me out, my husband's addiction wears me out, and our lack of finances wears me out. I am tired of being the only one who seems to give a crap about anything around here. I am sick and tired of living paycheck to paycheck and still can't get ahead. It sucks when I think about the fact that our life was once good. My husband used to have an excellent paying job, we went on vacations, and our bills were caught up but since he lost that job in 2005 things have went down hill. After that is also when his alcoholism took over our lives. The job he has now pays ok but its still alot less than he was making. The problem is also his hours, never know what to expect from week to week because they vary so much. Could have 35 one week and 60 the next so its kind of hard to plan a true budget that we can live with. Although, it doesn't matter anyway, I try to work with what we have each week but he sets us back with his drinking every week so I can't win. I'm sick of trying, he doesn't understand that you can't live like a prince on a pauper's salary. The phone rings all day long from a few bill collectors, I only can make minimum payments on the credit cards so I'll be paying those for the rest of my life if nothing changes. I am just so frustrated right now I don't know what to do anymore. I stress over this everyday but does he? NO why should he? I guess that's what wives are for. Why are men so damn selfish and immature? I know there are some good ones out there but where? I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and it just really sucks!!