JEAN97's Journal

MY HUSBAND JUST HAD ANOTHER SURGERY LAST THURSDAY. HE HAD A DETACHED RETINA. WE WERE AT THE HOSPITAL EVERYDAY LAST WEEK. HE IS HOME BUT HIS EYE LOOKS SO BAD. IT IS BLACK, GREEN AND PURPLE. HIS EYE IS BLOOD RED. HE IS IN SO MUCH PAIN AND HE CAN'T SEE OUR OF IT EITHER. IT WAS HIS GOOD EYE BECAUSE THE OTHER HE ONLY HAS ABOUT %50 VISION. I AM HAVING A FLAIR-UP STILL. IT ISN'T AS BAD AS THE LAST ONE BUT IT IS PAINFUL. I DON'T KNOW HOW I WILL EVER GET OVER FLAIRS IF I CONSTANTLY HAVE STRESS IN MY LIFE. IT IS JUST 1 THING AFTER ANOTHER. IT IS NOT JUST A COLD BUT SOMETHING COMPLACATED. I HAVE BEEN ON A ROLLER COASTER THIS WHOLE YR. WELL ACTUALLY FOR THE PAST 4 YRS. I WOULD LIKE TO GET OFF NOW. I AM TRYING TO WORK FULL-TIME, IN ADDITION TO, RUNNING THE HOUSE, RUNNING ERRANDS, TAKING SOMEONE TO THEIR APPTS AND WHAT-EVER ELSE NEEDS DONE. IT S NEVER ENDING. I AM STILL FEELING VERY OVER-WHELMED AGAIN OR STILL. HOW TO NOT HAVE SO MUCH STRESS. HOW TO HAVE CALM AND PEACE IN MY LIFE. I DO NOT KNOW. BYE JOURNAL.

More tests again today. I know this might b it for awhile. I will know the results by th end of the week. I think it will be a quick fix. Maybe diet and or more meds. My pain is still there. It is bearable but I would like it to stop now. I  will wait until the tests come back but I think I need something for pain. At least for awhile. If I could just get some stress out of my life. But how? This yr. has been a roller coaster. Actually, it has been for the past 4 yrs. My daughter, has had health issues that long. She has seen many drs, surgeries and been in so much pain. My husband with his strokes, diabetic, breast surgery and blood clots. He isn't himself anymore. He has mabe 1 day a week where he can do things. The other days he sleeps/watches tv. He is depressed and I do understand. He was used to working and being active. I feel pulled in so many directions. It is my husband, my daughter, my parents, my job, my other girls, my other responsibilities and my health. How do I handle all of these balls? But handle them without too much stress. It is a balancing act that I am not sure I know how to do. Life doesn't get any easier. Young or old there are so many problems to over come. It just always seems like I am going uphill never downhill. I  am still trying to find my way. I am feeling alone and no where to turn. Tomorrow I will try again. Well journal out for now.