JimK's Journal

Monday, May 12, 2008 -- 2:25 PM

I seem to have been having problems lately. The weekend was bad and I felt rotten. Of course, part of that was due to Mother's Day, which always brings back a lot of unpleasant memories for me. That is over, and I am still not feeling good.  

One of the main difficulties I am having is with a lack of sleep. No matter what I try to do, I just do not get a good night's sleep. Last night I barely slept a wink. That is not helping me at all. Sleep deprivation is taking its toll on me.

I am having a lot of frustrations as well. A decision needs to be made about how to proceed with trying to get a service dog. (I wish my psychologist had never dreamed up the idea.) It was bad enough when I was working with only one agency that had these types of dogs, but now there are two agencies to deal with. Added to that, is my doctor, my psychologist, the social worker at my doctor's office, and the social worker that I am seeing at the mental-health clinic where I go. My sister has become involved as well -- as if I needed one more person! There are just too many people to please including myself. I am not getting anywhere -- I am stuck, and do not know where to turn.

This afternoon I am working on making phone calls and appointments. I have somehow managed to make two doctor's appointments on the same day and at the same time. One appointment now needs to be changed. One of the agencies for the service dogs has offered to take me on a tour of its facilities. I need to set up a day and time to go there.

I am still having pain from the accident I had in December. My doctor has now decided to send me to a wheelchair seating company for a reevaluation. I have spent a good part of today trying to get through to someone who can schedule a day and time that I can go there. I called and left a very detailed message, but as of now, my call has not been returned. Why is it that that does not surprise me?

My brother sent me an e-mail in late April, which I need to answer. I have been putting it off as long as possible because of my anger toward him because of his being charged, and found guilty, of driving under the influence. If our positions had been reversed, he would still be yelling and swearing at me.

As if none of that is enough, my sister has written my brother telling him (among other things) that the physical therapy I have been getting is not helping me. She is wrong about that, so now I have to clear that up with my brother, who I do not want to contact to begin with!

My kitchen table is FILLED with more than a dozen bottles of pills for me to take daily. Most of the bottles of pills have labels warning me that the pills can cause dizziness and drowsiness. They are right about that. The only thing the pills do not do is to help me get some badly needed sleep!

These are just a few of the things I have been going through lately. Does it take a genius to figure out why I am not happy these days? Duh!  (This does not apply to DS members.)

Quotes for Success:

“Success always occurs in private and failure in full public view.”

Anonymous