Bella0290's Journal

Today i have felt quite downcast. We did not have such a great day due to both of us being stressed, and well he has things on his mind that are affecting him. Although he will confide in me briefly about these issues, he still holds back, thinking it better to avoid troubling me. I can not help but let it get too me. He usually has, on average, a couple of days were he is in a foul mood, they frustrate me increasingly because i can not communicate with him properly due to him holding back to prevent snapping at me, or hurting me. His moods end up triggering mine, and i get cross and angry at him, i seem unable to help it. Just gets me so annoyed.

Two girls have declared their love for him this week. I do not feel too comfortable with it because of who they are. One is his ex girfriend who seems desperate to get back with him, and now constantly texts and calls him. The slightly disturbing issue is that she seems to know a fair bit about me, which is strange. He annonced to me that i am the only one for him and there is no need to feel like i may lose him, but how can i not think that when she is pretty and keeps bothering him? The other girl used to go to his old school and is two years ahead of him, and declared her love for him for the past few years or so. She appears besotted with him, it makes me feel uncomfortable to know these girls are ringing him alot. I dont know what to do

:(

Urges to cut too. Failing exams. Wanting to cry. Lonely. Fed up with life.