XxSarahAquaXx's Journal

I received a message from my mother-in law i realize my words hurt her feelings even though they were taken the wrong way, i never meant to say she or the family couldn't see Levi, that was never my intention, laura and the whole family is allowed to see Levi whenever they want to. Even if i am hated now for my words. But they are not understanding how they hurt my feelings they aren't seeing how hurt I am over everything, my feelings where really hurt that night and i cant seem so feel any better about it. I told laura i was sorry over and over, thats not what i meant at all its not, i didnt mean for her to feel that she couldn't see her own grandson, thats no what i meant at all, i feel even worse for hurting her, maybe if would have been best if i never came along in there lives in the first place and i wouldn't have hurt anyone at all, every time i get close to someone i hurt them. I should just leave the face of the earth, no one but my son needs me, maybe even he would be better off, maybe he would have a better life if i wasn't around. I have hurt everyone. I feel like no one cares about my feelings what so ever, i feel like a rock people keep kicking around on the ground like i have no feelings. But i guess i don't matter, im just another soul in the world without a purpose. i feel i have a purpose but no one seems to want to help me or even bother with me. I am just a hateful person with no feelings. I cant stand myself right now, i hurt alot of people i care about, even though they have hurt me, that doesnt matter anymore, cause i dont matter, but i hurt them and i feel like trash for doing so.

Im done venting there is no point no one reads this anyways