Joeyrose1107's Journal

the green eyed monster
Current mood: quixotic

Jealousy. You know what i'm talking about. THE "why can't i look like her" "why is she talking to him?" "did that guy just check out my girl?" "are they really just friends?" the "she is so damn skinny" or "he is so damn lucky" It's horrible. But as humans it is unfortuantely natural for us to be jealous of each other. But jealousy is an emotion deeply rooted with another emotion...insecurity. Which unfortunately is often a human trait we all inherit as well. I would like to take you back where a time i felt supremely jealous... At an MS support group...this woman reported she had no more MS lesions. I got so mad! I got so upset! WHAT? this lady... her meds worked for her and they didn't work for me...Her lesions healed over and my 50+ lesions were only worsening by the day??? Then today one of my other friends reported he no longer had any lesions on his brain according to his new MRI...i felt absolutely jubilant over this. i was so happy for him. It made me smile ear to ear... So what's the difference between these two situations...Well for one the first situation was when i first got diagnosed...I have been through some hell on earth attacks and now i feel that this woman...she probably went through these hell on earth attacks too... having gone through so many symptoms i now appreciate when someone goes into remission not get jealous... So maybe it's the same with all jealousy...Maybe unless we've been in that persons' shoes we will never know how their life is...We can be jealous of someone all we want but in the end...will we ever know what they go through... and it will never make us any better wishing to be more like someone... For example...say you are jealous of my body...would you know that i work out everyday? And this isn't to keep my body fit...it's to help my multiple sclerosis. I try to strengthen my muscles so they won't weaken and i will not have to use a wheelchair anytime soon... I just see the world a lot clearer now...It makes no sense to envy. Only to appreciate what you have...After all aren't we supposed to complete each other not compete with each other?