bored~bored~bored!! I eat when …
bored~bored~bored!! I eat when I am bored~~After Rodger Died I couldn't eat..Now I eat all the time...I gotta …
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It has been a long time sense I have written!! Life just has been busy and crazy and I want to thank all my true friends for hanging in there with me!!
Today is my sons 18th birthday and marks 18 years of panic, agoriphobia and depression!! I know way blame my son he has been the light of my life and he no longer lives with me he is working and in school and for that I am so very proud but every time he comes down latley he spends so much times with friends I never see him!! Mothers day he did call but no little card in mail nothing!! Now today his 18th birthday he drives down and he does not even stop by he says he is going out camping on lake with friends!! I know how the child seperation thing is but he had time to stop by a friends house to pick up a gift but no time to stop by and say hello nothing!! He just said I will see you some time tomorrow!!! What is that?? I have worried what do I get him for his birthday I even bought him several pairs of shorts for summer over a month ago and he says he keeps forgetting them!! I know he is not doing drugs because he gets tested at work alot but he knows how emotional I am!! He knows he is my life and I guess he also knows I will forgive him for anything!! It just hurts because I get myself so excited he is coming and I dont see him!! I never did that to my parents. We celebrated together then I would go wih friends later!! Well times have changed. I just feel like I should not worry about his birthday now cake , presents what the hell for let his friends do it!! wow what a vent!! So now I just sit here feeling sorry for myself or lonely because umm that is a good question i should of know I should not have set myself up for this fall!!!
UPDATED GOALS
To make friends
Progress 10%
Encouragements: 3
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i know you are upset but times have changed, you said when you were growing up you spent time with your family , i loved being with my family when i was growing up to. i was a mama's baby.lol he is at an age right now that all he is thinking about is his friends, and he probally doesn't realize he is hurting you . i would bet that he loves you dearly and just doesn't stop to think. as he gets older he will realize what a wonderful mother he has and will start changing and wanting to be with you more . try not to be sad , hes just being a normal teenager. i know it is hard not to be hurt . take care oxxoxxoxoxoxox love you lizzy
dizzylizzie
I know he loves me but he know he hurts me when he does thisbut mom always forgives!!
unhappydeb
mothers do always forgive because our children are very precious to us , he will understand someday how lucky he is . xxoxoxoxx lizzy
dizzylizzie
The pain of some one you love not making the effort is the worst pain of all. I know how you feel.
st5ve