nicoleh21's Journal

i want a cigarette so badly! my guy friend's exgirlfriend keeps messaging me telling me all these things about him. theyr'e not true and i know she's just psychotic but it's stressing me out. usually when i am stressed i go smoke and i can't do that. i don't wanna eat the typical girl ben & jerrys because i'm afraid of gaining the weight from not smoking. this girl is making way to much drama, like she's the one in highschool, not myself. then i go online to get some help with the smoking and i find nicotine anonymous but you need a username and password before you can even get to the site and sign up. what the hell?

i keep thinking, i'm only on my second day and i'll just start over later and this is way to hard to do. it's harder than any other drug i've quit. i put in my cd that came with the patch and the guy's talkin about how if you're seriously addicted it may take a few times before you really can quit and i'm like ohhh really.. there's a seed planted in my head.

writing this kinda helps but i'm still thinking about just smoking american spirits because hey those are additive free! addiction is crazy.