I'm feeling a little better …
I'm feeling a little better now since my appt. last week. Just had to let all that settle into my mind, but I'm …
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I'm making a mistake. I can feel it. I'm getting my hopes up, and I hate it when I do this to myself. Ever since the doctors said I had to put off clomid for at least 6 months, I've been using my fertility monitor and really (seriously) starting to chart my cycle, CM, BD and all. So my monitor told me for 4 days or so that I had a high fertility level, but not peak. And I think I even got a positive in an OPK. But I'm not 100% sure. But my DH and I continued to have fun BD-ing anyways. Now, here I am five days before my next period getting my hopes up and thinking about "what if's". What really REALLY sucks is if I'm not PG then I'm really going to feel like I've let my DH down b/c he's really excited and hopes everything worked out this month. I just hate that I've let myself feel vulnerable like this. Hope can be what gets you through, but being hopeful can also be what breaks your heart. And I feel like I can handle this whole thing much better when I expect nothing but AF each month. It just sucks so bad being in this stupid IF situation to begin with!
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I am beginning to dread the fertility clinic. I enter with such hopes that I am ovulating or that we some how got …
we all do this. if it makes you feel any better i got the first response pregnancy test it has two tests. i took the first one five days before missed period and got a negative i tested 4days later and got a positive. if you really want to know go ahead and test. :) If you get a negative just think well it still can be. try not to set yourself up too much. I had talked myself down after the negative but when period didn't stop i took another one. :) God bless and good luck
melodyM
Here's to better days ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
LLexa
I put way too much pressure on myself, I struggle with relaxing and letting things happen! Things will get easier! You will never let your DH down if he understands the IF process! Times will be discourageing, but look to the future and where you may be in a year, you might get your BFP sooner then you think! Hang in there!!!
jnhaney84