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I haven't pulled my hair since March 15th. I saw 20/20 had a special on Medical Mysteries. Trich. was one of them. I ended up getting on youtube and doing a search for people who posted video blogs. I saw a girl my age with a hoodie on. She talked about how she's had it for so many years and that she accepts it. At the end of the video she takes her hoodie off. She shaved head and still pulled out huge patches of hair.
I realized that all I've been doing is talking about how I want to quit and how I'm going to do it. I've been missing the most important part. WHEN? When am I going to quit? When am I going to take charge? When am I going to take back control of myself.
The answer was that night. I cried the entire time watching that girl because she accepts having Trich. She has let it take over her. I can't. I can't shave my head. I can't look myself in the mirror knowing that I'm letting this control me. I haven't pulled my hair since that night and I plan on not even touching my hair unless I'm in the shower or I have to. I refuse to accept that I have Trich and that's it. Yeah I have it but I can regain control. After all this is my body.
I encourage anyone who truly wants to stop pulling to say when and not want.When do you want to stop pulling? We all want to stop pulling, that's a given. We all need to hit rock bottom and look at ourselves and admit we lost control. After that, we realize that we can beat this.
UPDATED GOALS
Not Pull For 1 Day
Progress 100%
Encouragements: 1
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Comments
WOW! i almost cried reading this your so right these ARE out bodies and we CAN take control. This journal moved me so much and i know that each and everyone of us will beat this! congradulations!!! on your days of not pulling!!!! im so proud of you! And i wish you the best luck! love Didi xoxoxoxoxo
didi21
Hey Ashley, I'm so happy for you! I think reaching rock bottom is an important step in healing (from anything, whether it's trich, alchoholism, other addictions)! I'm right there with you, good luck!
sparky88
What a powerful piece! Do you think you could get me the link to that video?
BeautifulLiar
Thankyou for that :D It is tru- we can't let this thing take us over- no matter how impossible it may seem. I'm feelin like i'm in a big deep hole and it's taking over- if we all keep encourageing each other and sharing tips etc then maybe it'll be possible :)
girlwithasecret