Kimbers's Journal

I must admit, the head pain and jaw pain is getting to me a bit today. It did not stop all day and neither did I. Just had to do what I had to do. I refuse to give into this pain even though it can last for days, and at times for 24 hours a day for a couple of months. Praying alot as I am in the studio to record on Wednesday and really would help if I can open my jaw to sing. Right now that is a big OUCH. The problem with this crap is they have tried everything over the past 25 years to control it. Well nothing has ever worked long term so I just take meds as I need to. Not big on them. They do not tend to work long so I end up at the hospital and they go in with needles and hit the nerves and start freezing to give me some relief for awhile.

Can't put my head down to sleep cause every muscle spasms on the left side of my head neck and face and jaw. If anything touches it , it just makes it worse. I have been to every specialist

there is. They say I am the worst case they have ever seen. So my only hope is prayer.

The last specialist I saw said he does not know how I even stand up somedays. Between the pain from that along with the fibro, and complications from the SS. What really gets me some days is that I seem to know more than they do. Scary isn't it. LOL

I even tell the jaw specialists where to adjust the retainers. God blessed me a great pain tolerance. I do know that if I ever give into it I have had it.

Don't get me wrong when it gets to can't stand up at all. I do go to the hospital. I only know that I can not lay in bed. I have learned that they are now using botox injections for facial pain. HMMMMM very costly, and can change appearance. No insurance is covering it here yet. I talked to someone who tried it and said they were pain free for 3 months. So I am thinking on it. 

So I was a bit down today. My sister is not coming to my wedding. neither is the rest of my family not far away from me like my aunts another sister and uncles.. 3 cousins are coming. They emailed me today. They were sorry others were not coming, Before today the only family was my Mom and Dad. Although I was a bit hurt by this, I thought and said "hey me" just focus on those who are coming. My native sister by heart is coming:) Well and My sister in recovery The Pegers is coming :) You know her as Peganony. Then I thought well don't be down, You have been blessed with a loving man. I also need to be grateful that I am not gambling and can afford a nice wedding.

NO Matter what is going on, things could always be worse.

So here is the Kimbers reminding herself to always live in the moment. keeps your spirits up.

AS for the physical pain...well I am thankful that I am alive to feel it. OUCH. :)

If you are reading this you have just been hugged,

Thank you for thinking of me,

Thank you for taking the time.

Love and hugsssssssssss

Kimber