bobbi507's Journal

I cannot sleep. I hate this horrible feeling inside of me. i cannot even figure out what it is i am feeling. lonliness, guilt, sadness, depression, fear, anxiety.......i feel i am going crazy. i feel i am losing my mind. i am so miserable. there is never anyone to talk to. i am so disgusted with myself. why cant this shitty depression go away. it is consuming my whole life and everyone's life around me. i would not blame my old man if he went and found someone else. who wants a piece of shit like me. i feel hollow....i do not know how to put into words how miserable i am. all i want to do is sit and stare at the walls. i sit and cry every day about something, never fails. i cant leave the house by myself. i would give anything to make this depression go away......anything. what is making me so unhappy? would i even be able to change whatever could be making me so unhappy. why cant i get out of bed in the morning? why do i sit in my pajamas all day, i hate moving, i hate doing anything but staring at the walls. i have never been this sad in my whole life. sometimes i really miss the people that use to be in my life and are now gone. i laughed then, i do not laugh anymore.