bobbi507's Journal

I woke up today in so much pain i could harldy move, i could not get out of bed to even get my pain pills across the room...I cannot stand this anymore. my migraines which were gone for a long time came back with a vengeance....nothing helps them, nothing i have...i refuse to take the Epidren anymore, no way.....it makes my chest feel awful. short of breath....i dont even want to go to bed for fear of the pain i endure in the morning. i cannot understand why the pain is getting so bad again, or why the migraines are coming back...the Vicodin is not strong enough, i need something stronger that lasts longer just for the night.....something long acting, to get me through the night and up moving around before the pain has a chance to set in. the pain was so bad i could not move, it was so bad....what am i gonna do? this is not minor pain, it is major pain.....stiff, stabbing achy....i take prescription strength Advil before i go to bed, i dont know maybe i need the old man to wake me up when he goes to work so i can shovel more pain pills in during the night. i will try that, i will probly be in such a half dead state that i will not even be aware of him shoveling pills down my throat....i can feel some pain starting to settle in my back. i think i need to sleep shorter hours in blocks, instead of trying to sleep 7 or 8 hours a crack, maybe 4 and then the old man can wake me up, then i can go back to bed. maybe i need muscle relaxers....God i do not know what to do. I am not able to function. i guess the small supply of Percs i get will have to do for just at night.....they last a tad longer than Vicodin, they do not seem to make me as unalert as the Hydros, i wish he would just switch me to those, but i am scared shitless to ask. i know what he will think, that i am getting tolerant to the Hydro when they really only provided minimal relief in the first place, i mean they are better than nothing. for the longest time, ANY relief was better than none. Not any more, i want at least 80-100% pain relief...i am entitled to it as a human being....If i was an animal i would be put down. the migraines are really making me angry. they were gone and now they are back....i am in pain, i hate this.....i dont want to go to bed, i will wake up in excrutiating pain. the pain is all over right now,