ErnestE's Journal

        Another day has begun, which means one day closer to meeting Jamie. We are chatting on MSN now. Athough I would rather have more control of my surroundings than taking the bus will allow. I know that not only saving the money is a good thing, but the stress on me driving that far would be incredible. Not to mention the stress on a car that has a 120,000 miles on the engine. So now I settle down and concentrate on saving money for the bus ticket. I know that my excitement will build as the day to leave comes closer, but I know that God's grace with help me handle it. Well I am down to about 20 minutes until I leave for church and the anticipation of a good service is building. If given the opportunity tonight I will sing with the choir, and who knows someday even solo. After church tonight I will pick up the prints from digital photos of Jamie and Darla. I will also mail a picture of myself to Jamie tonight, if I don't forget. I did pick up the pictures tonight, but I will need to wait until tomorrow so I can apply the proper postage. This day has been so AWESOME, THANK YOU!!!!! LORD JESUS!!!! I heard a that a child has come to Christ so far in the revival in Ohio. So that just raised my mood tonight at church. The Pastor that preached during our revival stood tonight. I truly enjoy hearing this brother's preaching. Partly for his courage against his infirmities. If I heard him correctly the doctors don't even want him out of bed, and forget traveling to preach God's word, but he is still on his feet and has vowed to stay on his feet until he is called out of this world. I have great admiration for that kind of faith and courage. Although sometime I am ashamed for the way I whine about my insignificant pains and problems, when I see this brother and knowing the status of his health. I see that the time for my late local news is approaching. I will take a break to see what went on today that I missed, and should have cared about.. lol I noticed that a young DS friend removed me from her friends list. This is my fault, I hurt them deeply. I made some promises that caused an uproar in my home. Even though I know living in an apartment would STINK when compared to the house I have called home my entire life. It would almost be worth the sacrifice. If I leave the house and move to an apartment then I won't have to kiss my familie's *** to do something in or around the house. If the person with whom I share expenses were to move or pass way, their would probably be an argument about the person that I chose to live with me and I WILL NOT TOLERATE THAT ****. Before my grandmother's health started failing, she attempted to control every aspect of my life even well after I turned 21. I made a promise to myself very soon after my grandmother passed away. That NO ONE would control me like she did. My family is trying that crap right now in different ways. Their is pressure being placed on me to move out of the house so it will be sold and the money split between the four people named in the Will. This would leave me probably finding an apartment and that is unacceptable. The house has quite a large yard to care for and that could be problem for me if I am unable to use the riding lawnmower. This is the only major problem that I see with me living here alone should something happen to the person with whom I share expenses. Other than that just renting or buying pressure washer to wash the exterior of the house once a year or so. Well I am going to end this journal here. I am on the phone with Jamie, so this day will end on a wonderful note.