this is the first time in 2 days I have been able to get on the computer without hubby badgering the crap out of me with the question "Are you telling that on line people how bad I am? or are you talking to your on line friends instead of me" I am so sick of having to answer to him. I just want to cry,
I do have to say that we have made a step foward though, I made hubby go to his dr and get a physical and I was there and I told the dr all about his mood swings and intence irratiblity, and they have put him on Prozac. I really think he needs it and he actually told me thanks for going with him and telling the dr for him since he didn't have the strength to do it himself. He actually went to the pharamacy himself and got it filled and then came straight home and took it.
I called and set up the appointment for the forms to get filled out and the titers drawn for my nursing school. I go next week wednesday. once that hoop is jumed through I have to get fingerprinted and a background check for clinicals. That's okay cause i have to have the fingerprinting and background thing for babsitting the niece and nephews, so that'll kill 2 birds with one stone.
Hubby went yesterday morning and did a hamper full of laundry, but somehow he forgot to pick up my work clothes so they didn't get washed and I have to work tomorrow and all weekend. So that means I have to go to the laundry mat tomorrow and get those done.
Daughter has been home for the last 2 days, she's had a fever and a sore throat, i took her to the dr yesterday and they thought she may have mono, but they did the bloodwork and she doesn't have mono but they think she has a virus ans she needs to rest, so i have kept her home and let her rest. TOday she was pretty roudy so i think she is ready to go back to school. plus she was really getting on my nerves today and I am ready for her to go back to school.
I am feeling really really down here lately, I am really really apprehensive about this whole babysitting thing, it's be a source of major anxiety, in fact my chest hurts just talking about it. Turns out 2 days ago sister in law told me that now she has signed the oldest up for summer school 4 days a week, and we would have to go get him 2 days a week at noon from school, only issue is that the school is 10 miles each way and that's more gas that we're going to have to burn, plus now gas went up here to $3.80 a gallon today, and I really can't afford these gas prices and when I do babysit these kids I am going to make a bit more money than I make now and that means I will lose more food stamps in the near future. I have already told sister in law that she will be having to provide some food for her kids, since they eat like pigs and all. She was fine with that, so I am going to make her a list of what she needs to provide for them,it's not going to be extravagant but the "staples" milk, bread, lunchmeat, since afterall they will be eating 2 or 3 meals a day, five days a week over here. I don't think that's too much to ask. I know that I am going to be the one in charge when the babysitting starts, but still I don't want to have a miserable summer and i don't want to spend the summer screaming at kids, and pulling my hair out for 60hrs a week. I honeslty think the biggest issue with the kids is going to be the hubby, he just loves to torment the kids and "push their buttons" and make them mad so they fight with him, and even though I have already talked to him about it and he says he's going to be good this summer and not torment them I can't help but be apprehensive and know that he's really good and saying one thing and doing another. He's really good at telling me what he thinks I want to hear and the doing whatever he wants to do. Maybe with the new medication he will actually change his behavior, I can pray anyways.
Oh i think i may be on the right road to getting better sleep, I have told myself that it's okay for me to go to sleep and if the kids do happen to wake up, i know that they'll come wake me up they always do, so there is no reason to let that keep me from sleeping. Plus hubby said that I dont have to worry about the alarm clock thing, since the clock is on his side and it wakes him up, plus then he's responsible for getting her to schoool on time and if she's late, its his fault not mine. I do have to say that I have been sleeping a bit better since I had a talk with myself.
I think I am done whinning for the night... talk to you all again later
UPDATED GOALS
Progress 50%
Encouragements: 0
Add your support
May 1, 2008 11:32pm
1 Comment
Now that I have gotten a few questions answered, it turns out that if I do watch sister in law's 3 kids, I would be making more money than what I am currently makeing waiting tables, plus i would get to stay home with my own kids too, and then I ...
June 6, 2007 9:52pm
1 Comment
WOW! What a week so far! Sorry to all my friends for not being on the past few days but I have been really busy. It is the last wweek of school and all my kids have had some little something @ school from field day , to awards day and even a ice ...
April 16, 2007 5:46am
No comments
Hello all !!! I really hope I get a sleep study appt soon as my sleeping is soooooooo messed up. I had badddddddddd apnea before the weight loss but i feel i have it back again and so does my hubby. I do a lot of jerking my legs and body while ...
Hi Robin! Boy you sure have a lot on your plate. I am glad that you vent on here. Tell hubby about the computer, "this is just my little outlet. No one thinks you're bad or awful. It's just nice to have friends to talk to without having to leave the house." Or something like that. He feels threatened, so maybe if you define what it is you do, he might understand better. ??
If I were you - I'd add that you will remind him if he starts up with the kids and driving you nuts. Just have that as part of the agreement and ask that as soon as you give him the signal, he needs to knock it off. :o)
My kids just had sore throats and fevers. Then, they lost their voices. Three out of four of my kids had this. They didn't go to the doctor. They did get over it. Maybe we had the same virus? Usually with mono they have really swollen glands. But my kids' glands were not swollen. Are your daughter's swollen? Just curious.
Suggestion: Maybe you can combine other errands with picking up the boy from summer school to save on gas.
Sleep is so vital. I just read an article today that studies show that people who get too little or too much sleep are more prone to having a weight problem and belly fat. I can relate! Too little was less than 6 hrs; too much was more than 9. It will be so good for you to get the right amount!
Try to breathe and pay attention to those chest pains. Your body is telling you to cut down your stress level, perhaps? Breathe and keep things in perspective. Is the babysitting temporary - just for the summer? If so, remind yourself of that.
I am glad you can spill here! Hang in there and be well. Remember your water - I'm trying to also.
HUGS
Chris
Trying2BeBetter
Hi Robin...ditto Chris' advice! Plus, I'm glad you are being assertive w/ sis-in-law about providing food. I think that's absolutely fair, you can't loose money watching her children! Maybe she could even give gas money (you could figure mileage price/gallon etc... and come up with an amount that it costs to get her children). It sounds like being with the kids will be the fun part, it's sis-in-law and hubby that you will have to keep in line :)
footprints4u
Hey there hun, what you talk about with us is your business, and we all have to vent just to take some of the stress off our shoulders. Glad you're getting your things all in order and ready for the coming months. I hope hubby will be better with his medication. I know my mom suffered bad with mood swings and the doc gave her a "happy pill" as my father called it, and she was back to her old self right away. Much easier to deal with mello than crying all the time, that's for sure. Lots of hugs and kisses to you, Deb :0)
Debbie66