I feel so horrible. I left him …
I feel so horrible. I left him because he kept cheating. He seriously lied to me about 10 or 12 times over the last …
Join Now
Today is the 3rd week of a bad breakup... I guess i should call it that.
Will and I were perfect for each other, but I had God, and he didn't yet. I helped him through the pain of his divorce and his father's death, and we didn't date or anything during the divorce to keep everything as Christian as possible.
Now, he has God, and thinks that he should not be happy, that he should go back to his ex and her child. He loves "his son" even though they aren't biological, and I support that with all my heart. But she was mean and cruel, and now she is getting this wonderful man back because he is "young enough to wait another 8 years" to be there for his son to grow up.
If he loved her, I'd get over this. But he calls me every day telling me how much he loves me and how sorry he is and that God probaby meant for this to happen to us.
I have prayed for relief, to not love him, to love him and be happy that he's making a sacrafice for his son, everything, anything, but I can't seem to get past this! I can't stop crying. I don't believe any guy is worth this pain, but I can't stop it. I can't breathe, I'm having panic attacks, it doesn't make sense.
I have tried to stop communication with him because he seems to want my help to get back into the loveless marriage.
Seriously, can this be a physical problem? Because my thoughts and reality don't seem to warrant this amount of pain.
Will and I were perfect for each other, but I had God, and he didn't yet. I helped him through the pain of his divorce and his father's death, and we didn't date or anything during the divorce to keep everything as Christian as possible.
Now, he has God, and thinks that he should not be happy, that he should go back to his ex and her child. He loves "his son" even though they aren't biological, and I support that with all my heart. But she was mean and cruel, and now she is getting this wonderful man back because he is "young enough to wait another 8 years" to be there for his son to grow up.
If he loved her, I'd get over this. But he calls me every day telling me how much he loves me and how sorry he is and that God probaby meant for this to happen to us.
I have prayed for relief, to not love him, to love him and be happy that he's making a sacrafice for his son, everything, anything, but I can't seem to get past this! I can't stop crying. I don't believe any guy is worth this pain, but I can't stop it. I can't breathe, I'm having panic attacks, it doesn't make sense.
I have tried to stop communication with him because he seems to want my help to get back into the loveless marriage.
Seriously, can this be a physical problem? Because my thoughts and reality don't seem to warrant this amount of pain.
Comments
You might also like ...
Always trust your intution because …
Always trust your intution because it is usually right, it was definitley true to me. I got him!!! And …
day 5 since i left
lat night was difficult for me because i wasnt able to get ahold of my husband all night i felt scared, worried, …
Well these kind of thing happens to people who are suffering from depression. It seems that he has 2 women now. The loveless marriage one and the helpful Christian woman. Maybe you should just let him have one and see what happens.
Robyn555
Thanks, and lol! Hugs
christielovesjesus
As long as he can have both of you there for him, why would he choose? No one is making him. If you love someone, set them free. You know that saying. He's confused and mixed up right now as to what the "right" thing to do is and only he can figure out what that is. That's the part that hurts the most cuz you can see how things really are but he's too close to the situation to see it. Depression can really create a lot of physical problems for you. I had severe back, neck, hip, and everything pain, chest pain, shortness of breath, nausea, vomiting, panic attacks, paranoid episodes, emotional outbursts, went thru every emotion possible in like an hour, blackouts, memory loss, confusion, pretty much you name it. Only it turns out that the 15 plus years they were always trying to treat me for depression I actually had the narcolepsy and it was posing itself as depression cuz when you just get that tired, you cannot function. Your body shuts down and your brain misfires to purposely slow you down to recover. They still think from time to time that I have the depression in there too but I can't take any antidepressants cuz they cause too many side effect issues for me. As far as it being used against you in regards to your child, you can always call legal aid and ask over the phone about it. They should be able to tell you. Hope that helps and if you need to talk, I'm here. I'm finding out that you're only as alone as you want to be. There are a great bunch of people on this site that just want to help each other and be there for each other. Reach out and receive that help, even if it's just to know you're not alone. Have to head to bed now cuz I'm going to drop soon. Talk to you later I hope. Remember, whatever we feel like we messed up today, well, God just wipes it clean while you're sleeping and gives you a fresh start tomorrow. Hang in there.
KarenS
She's ours biological. After thinking about it, he is more messed up than me ;-) and he will never get help.
And to Karen - OMG - I didn't think to think about the narcolepsy as part of my problem. I have actually cut back on the Ritalin because I didn't want to feel the extra anxiety from the Ritalin on top of the pain of losing whom I thought was my soulmate... but that might be better than the shutting down I have been feeling... tomorrow I will try taking the medicine full time... pray for me, that stuff has caused me to be quite edgy
christielovesjesus