Journal Entry for June 13, 2008
June 13, 2008 9:45am
Heyy everyone! Well yeesh it's been quite a different life for me recently. I'm finally truely getting over Matt. Like part of me will I …
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smileshideit’s Profile
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smileshideit
is feeling Excellent
relief exists i found it when i was cut~
About Me
Heyy I'm Joy ... I'm not weird or totally rad I'm simply me and for some people that’s not enough! I strongly believe that a person will only be happy if they are themselves. I will be just about anyone’s friend because I will accept you for exactly who you are and no matter what you look or act like. Sometimes in fact I mess up! (I’m being sarcastic by that) Because no one is always perfect... I believe strongly in second and sometimes third or fourth chances. I don’t like giving up on someone and if you’re my friend you probley know that. The one thing I would never give up in my life for anything is my passion for writing. I adore it, as weird as that may sound I do. Writing stories is a way of kind of experiencing different lives that I won’t get to live. I love to read so much, as long as it’s not anything school related though. I’m a very romantic kind of person to, I love romance movies and books and for me if my life was a movie I’d hope for a romance lol! If you ever feel alone and like you have no friends then well we should talk! Because I don’t think a person can have enough close friends! Even if you have lots of friends though we should still talk!!! Well so if you want to know me better then just ask, trust me I love to talk just ask my sisters!!!
Interests
The impossible~Love~Friends~ Writing~Reading~My family~Ella and Julie~
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Support Groups
Close Depression - Teen
Alot of it comes from my dad. He doesnt live with me but I care about him alot and it hurts to see him living a life that has nothing to do with me and he doesnt care to have me in it. Where ever I go I seem to never fit in with anyone. I do have a close friend or two but well it seems like I have tons of fake friends who simply say they like me and then I hear how much trash they say bout me behind my back. As well when I was younger I lost someone who was rly close to me so that adds to it..
Treatments
- Music Working / Worked
- I blast it and cry then fall asleep...
- Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked
- got a few ppl that I go to when I'm down and that does help sometimes!
- Writing Working / Worked
- It does help I love to write so it makes me feel happier but doesn't cure it.
Close Self-Injury
For me it started over a boy. I know that's a pathetic reason to cut but I would get super low over him and so I'd cut. After a while I decided to try to stop cutting and well that lasted as long as my happieness did. As soon as I got down again I cut well this lasted a few months and well I don't do it as often but still once and a while i do~
Treatments
- Talking Working / Worked
- Well it normally helps but sometimes it didn't do much for me but my friends are always by my side so that does help me!!
Open Eating Disorders
Type: BulimiaWell for me I would either go on stupid diets where I'd eat like nothing or I'd eat then throw up afterwards. I do it not as often but when my self esteem isn't as high I usually do..
Open Family Issues
Well normal stuff my parents hate each other stupid thing is theyre still together my dad works in CT. so he lives there to and comes home sometimes every few months! My dad managed to ruin my 3older siblings lives and well he's tryed to do it to me and my sister but he's failed..
Treatments
Open Teen Anxiety
well it's been more recently that I've been very stressed I feel like life is just gonna kill me or something lately I've been getting so scared and worried about life that I'll be shaking and soo scared. I don't know what to do it won't go away and well everytime I get that way I want to cut so it all seems to go wrong but I don't know how to deal with it??
Open Families & Friends Affected By Suicide
My dad was never there for me so he was my dad to me! I loved him so very much and it tore my world apart when he died. He killed himself may 4 03. It never gets any easier... I miss him everyday more than the last. I always wish he could be there to see me as I grow up but he's not. It's just something that I have to try and get past everyday.But when I see terrible things happening that I know wouldnt have ever happened if he was here it tears me apart inside...I miss him :'(
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