......
May 2, 2008 2:22am
I want to delete this stupid goal.
It's impossible to fall out of love or stop loving someone
and I've learnt that the hard way.
I wish I …
magyk’s Profile
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magyk
is feeling Excellent
back online after a much too long hiatus
Recently: 2 hugs received, 1 hug given more …
About Me
I'm a writer. Which is ironic because I'm depressed and tragic in my own special way... I hate myself but I'm trying to develop some sort of liking for myself. On a daily basis I'm suicidal. I figured out the reason that I've never gone through with suicide. I'm afraid of an after life. I don't want to go onto an after life or haunt some house or anything like that. I just want to cease to exist. I think that's what's been holding me back from suicide. Whether that's a good or bad thing is up for debate.
Interests
I love reading and writing. I code websites for fun and keep a journal. Book stores and libraries are like my candy stores, I could stay in a book store forever and just read for days on end.
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Journal
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This entry is private
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Tom
April 22, 2008 5:26pm
For those of you wondering who Tom is, I shall explain.
He's a boy I met on nex (Lame, I know. But I was bored and wanted to talk to some …
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Hm.
April 22, 2008 5:18pm
So I went on my facebook and blocked all the people in the last journal entry... but I don't feel any better.
If anything, just thinking about …
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Restraining order
April 16, 2008 3:52pm
So I think I want to get a restraining order against some people.
Arin Podolski
Misty Humphrey
Adrian Cornish
Levi Lafonte
Conrad Meers
Steven …
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Hugbook
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thanks!
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hope your week is going well!!!
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hey long time no talk hows it going/
Hug
wow... that's random haha. But it's good that something productive came from the stay. Was she there for the same reason or was it something else? And you soooo do NOT have to answer that because it's really nosy and stuff but I'm just curious.
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Hug
I did the same thing. I overdosed on some perscription sleeping aids and was put in the hospital and had to drink that shit... then I threw it all up on everyone in the psyc ward haha. But yeah... I know it sucks... :[
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Depression
Treatments
- Meditation Somewhat Helpful
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- Writing Working / Worked
Open Depression - Teen
Treatments
- Music Working / Worked
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- Writing Working / Worked
Open Anxiety
Treatments
- Breathing Exercises Somewhat Helpful
- Breathwork Somewhat Helpful
- Meditation Somewhat Helpful
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
Open Diets & Weight Maintenance
Treatments
- Curves Not Working
- Eating Healthier Foods Working / Worked
- Eat Less Too Soon to Tell
- Physical Exercise Somewhat Helpful
Open Teen Anxiety
So many things freak me out or scare me. It normally makes me cry or at least feel bad, which can lead to more SI
Open Breakups & Divorce
I recently broke up with my boyfriend. For some reason he seems to be completely fine with it, while I have cuts all over my arms because of all the pain this is causing me. It has caused me to want to commit suicide. I just want to move on with my life, but I miss being with him so much that I don't know how I'm going to be able to.
Treatments
- Music Working / Worked
- When I'm in a class with my ex I blast some music and get lost in what I'm doing. It really helps me to just ignore everything.
- Reading Working / Worked
- Whenever I'm upset I grab a book and just loose myself. Sometimes it works, some times it doesn't.
- Talking Working / Worked
- My best friend talked to me right before I was going to go grab some pills and give up. She made me feel great and (even though she didn't know it) convinced me to keep going strong. I love her. A lot of the people on DS have also been helping me. I feel great when I talk to people who don't necessarily know me or anything about me. They're way less biased and I feel like I can talk to them without feeling stupid.
Open Teen Sexuality
Type: PregnancyThere isn't much to say. I might be pregnant with my ex's child and I'm going through a lot with everything right now. I'm mainly here to help.
Open Bisexuality
I think I started figuring out I was bi when I was getting over Adrian. I talked to my best friend about dating her and marrying her a lot and kind of found out that I'm very attracted to women. I'm only slightly attracted to men. I always say I'm pretty much a lesbian except some guys are and exception haha
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Groups
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Snapshot
Recently …
- 1 hug given
- 2 hugs received
