MOMMYMAMAW's Journal

             Boy,things have been busy around my house!!! What with getting the baby settled in,taking him to the peditrician,wic appts,getting him on insurance and just the everyday thing to take care of when you have a newborn and a 14 month old together.The DR said he is in perfect health and was growing good.He has already gained 6 ozs.fortunatly he is a good baby and only cries when hungry or wet.He is a pure joy,alot of work but well worth it.There is nothing that smells quite like a new baby.Just holding him in my arms and watching him sleep is sooo relaxing....Jose is not feeling well tonight,he's real fussy and clingy.He still thinks his brother is facinating and likes to love on him.

              Bonnie hasn't even called about either of the babies.We've had a couple of hang ups from the motel where she stays but no one has talked to her.I don't understand how any one could give birth to a sweet little baby and not care anything about it.Its like my own daughter just don't care anything for her own babies.These poor babies need her love but she refuses to give it to them. It is not natural for a grandmother to have to be the mother to her grandchildren or for a woman not to love and protect her babies.I don't understand why this happened to any of our families.Don't get me wrong,I do not regret my taking my grandbabies,with out me who would love and protect them?they would be thrown away like bad trash instead of the wonderful blessing that they are.Now that I have them I CAN'T IMAGINE MY LIFE WITHOUT THEM.They have brought so much joy into my life.Everyday is like a wonderful dream when you wake up to baby kisses and little hugs.The love I see in those little faces makes my life worth living.They don't know that their mother rejected them and they will never know the pain of not being loved.Because I will make their lives as loving and full of happiness as I possibly can.They may not have all the expensive things in life but they will never have to live without knowing they are loved.I will give them the most importatnt thing in this world ....LOVE, FAITH,HOPE AND JOY.I will raise these children to know God and HIS unchanging Love,to know that he will never forsake them.Don't get me wrong I am by no means a perfect christian but I do have a very strong belief in God.I believe that the biggest mistake I made with my chidren was not keeping them in church.I taught them about God but didn't insist that they attend church.I didn't go myself like I should have and now I am paying for my mistakes.I was raised in church but strayed away when I got older.I will not make that mistake with my granbabies.Now I am finding my way back to God and want to help these babies know Him as I once did.With all the things I have been through wit hmy children lately has sent me back to find my Faith again.It is a shame that sometimes we turn our backs on God and it takes something bad to happen to turn us back to Him.

  Well,I hope everyone had a merry CHRISTMAS AND had the warmth and joy of their families.