Angelsbf's Journal

Journal Entry for November 4, 2007 Mood

Sunday, November 4, 2007

I don't know what to say. Angel is OK physically and was released from the hospital. She told me she "needed some space for a while." It hurt so much to hear her say that. I need her right now, she is the only one I want.

Let me tell you how it happened: We were at a party last night and I was hanging out with the guys for the first time in a long time. I've been very decicated to Angel lately and haven't seen them in a while. Angel came up to me and said "Kyle, I need to talk to you, NOW." Which startled me, I had never seen such terror in her eyes nor had her tell me 'NOW" in such a forceful way. So we went outside and she told me "Kyle, I am bleeding, we need to go to the hospital. I think I lost the baby." So we did. They did an exam and confirmed it. Angel stayed overnight and told me I should go home.

Have I lost Angel forever? Is it over? I don't know if I can live without her. I was hearing horrible voices last night for the first time ever.

My parents and her parents know that we lost the baby last night. They're devistated for us.

Worse, Ashley is going to be let out of the hospital tomorrow. Nightmare. She is not ready and Angel is going to try to help her when she doesn't have it in her to do so. I have talked to my parents and Angel's parents about taking Angel in for a while. Both said OK if Angel would agree to it. I don't know if she would.

Will she ever forgive me? We had really rough sex a few times while she was pregnant. I'm sorry I did that but, excuse the TMI factor... Angel enjoys it. Will she forgive me for that? We had rough sex yesterday before the party. TMI again... it was really good though. I'll never forgive myself for it. NEVER.

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Comments

rough sex doesnt cause misscarraige, so dont blame yourself. tell her not to blame herself either. take care of yourselves

micayla
sounds like she needs to get herself together after such inocedent. It would be hard. Rough sex doesn't cause a miscarrage. You both have no need to blame anyone. God just has a plan and knows you will overcome this struggle.

Rabbit11
Please don't blame yourself. Like the two posts ahead of me, rough sex does not cause miscarrage. It is perfectly healthy to have sex during pregnancy. God, I feel so, so bad for the two of you. I clicked on your profile to read some good news in your journal. I don't think you have lost Angel forever. The two of you sound like you love each other so much. This is probably just really hard for her on top of everything else that has happened recently. Give her her space, but also let her know how much you care for her and you will be waiting for her when she is ready.

skinnygirl2525
Hey, I am friends with angel on here, I think you two really need to sit down and talk both of you are feeling down and wondering about each other when you really both should be talking to each other so that you know what is going on..
It is no good to have all this stress around you at a time like this you both need eacho others support..
The sex would'nt have caused the miscarrige obviously this was just a test run for you. There are some evil things that happen for a reason!
I advise you talk to her get her to open up to you. Don't do anything to yourself anyone and not her to that would hurt her even more then she is hurting now..
Please look after her, I am worried for her
Reenxx

Muma2b
im so sorry 2 hear that u lost the baby...i think u need 2 tlk wiv angel n tell her how ur feeling...u need each other at this time!...plz dnt blame urself its not ur fault these things jst happen...take care of urself n angel...she needs u as much as u need her...xxxx

anon2
Kyle..as I told you the other nite, give her the space she asks for and time to greive the loss of her baby.As you see above, and as I mentioned to you having rough sex is not enough to induce a miscarrige. Do NOT blame yourself for this ok, this is Mother Nature at work. Stay positive hon))))))))))))))))))) Afriel (helen)

AngelAfriel
This is not your fault. Angel must be so devistated, stand by her and watch out for her. All you can do is support her and listen when shes ready. I'm so very very sorry for both of you. xxxxx

pinkjellybeans
Ok no updated journal entry, BUT I do see a lovely hug and kiss from Angel on the 5th "smile" Im hoping everything is now ok with you guys, hug angel for me ))))))))))) x

AngelAfriel