yescobosa's Journal

I have tried to diet I can't tell you how many times before.   Not sure this time will be any different, but I am going to give it a shot.  I am 43 years old (almost 44) and am 40 lbs overweight, at 5' 7" I weigh 175.  What makes it worse is before I became a mom I was in incredable shape! I have a wonderful, smart and funny 9 year old who also happens to be ADHD, so life is quite a challenge.  My husband who could be more supportive has his own business, so it keeps him busy.  I have not worked out consistantly since my son was born, and although I don't eat unhealthy I indulge in red wine more than I should.  I am depressed, unhappy, overweight, VERY self consious and feel dead inside.  I get up, go to work at a very stressful job, come home and cook, help my son with homework (which is a chore) do dishes, get everything ready for the next day and then get up and do it all over again. I am the first one up and the last one to bed.  My weekends are spent cleaning and trying to catch up on things I don't have time for during the week.  My once held passions of horses and poetry have been a thing of the past. 

I really want to try to turn my life around.  I want to start walking during lunch, join Weight Watchers in hopes it will help me feel better about myself.  Since I don't have my Arabian horses any longer I can't ride which was a huge relief for me when I was younger (boy I sure miss them ), but I can try to write again or perhaps start a new hobby.  This morning I weighed myself,  measured myself and VERY reluctantly took pictures of my puggy body as an incentive to change.  I am going to try to journal every day to see my progress both physically and mentally.  My goal is to loose 20 lbs by my birthday on December 5th.  Wish me luck, I am going to need it!