TennesseeKidd's Journal

contine with my past-- Well Joey was in kindergarten and Anthony in 3rd. Joey started kindegarten and the principal made a bad remark about him and Ralph's sister went off on her and she was nice to Joey until they got a new principal. In Nov 94 I found a lump on my right calf and didn't pay much attention until it started to hurt real bad. I was trying to go to school I was tired all the time and my leg hurt. I went to the VA clinic and the doc said I was anemic real bad and had a blood clot and he sent me to the VA hospital which is three hours away. My mom took me to the hospital and they did test and couldn't figure out what it was so they decided to do a biopsy and I got admitted and the next day they tried the biopsy with a local. Well it didn't work they cut into the lump and blood and pus came out. I started yelling it hurt and it took three people to hold me down. They knock me out and sew me up. The doc said the lump had grown into the blood vessel and nerve. They took more test and then did surgrey a week later. They took the tumor out and a blood vessel and a nerve. I was in the hospital for another week and went home. Three weeks later I had a checkup and the doc took me to a private room with my hubby and told me I had cancer call Liomyosarcoma. It was rare cancer cause by the NF. Well I then got another appt to see the radiation doctor and when I seen him he prepare me for radiation therapy. It was a long ways from home so I was put in the dormatory for vets that was connected with the hospital. The Vets included homeless,addicts and drunks. Old vets and new vets. My mom took me when it was time for treatments. I had no feelin on the bottom of my foot. I had a limp and the dorm food suck. For 6 weeks my mom pick me up from the hospital on friday and took me back on monday. She work in between and made sure Ralph did okay with the kids. My MIL help with the kids and I called twice a week to talk to them. During this time my hubby was working, trying to get a loan for a house and trying to find a house and stressing out about me. The loan company gave us a hard time because we had to file bankruptcy to get rid of the mobile home to stay on base when I was in the Air Force. I got mad called them up and ask them what the problem was and they kept giving me the run around. I told them I was three hours away from my family taking radiatinon treatments for cancer and my husband was trying to take care of my family. Well this did it within weeks we had a house and a loan. I didn't like to use my sickness to get something but I was real upset. In April 1995 I finish my treatments and was able to go home to stay. In May 15,1995 we moved in our house. The night before we moved in Joey had a bad asthma attack and we got in bed at 2am after taking him to the ER. We was tired but happy to get our new home. We had a three bedroom home with a garage and a apartment above the garage. I use the front room in the apartment for my office and the back room we store junk and toys. There was also two rooms behind the garage. It took some time to get situated but we did. Ralph kept working and I wanted to go back to school but Ralph wanted me to take some time off. I got 40% disability from the VA and lost my military pay. I still had a full Medical Retirement and benefits. In Jan 1996 I started going to Hiwassee College. The same school my mom graduated at when we were kids. I had teachers that was mom's teacher. I made alot of friends and enjoy school. I needed a vehicle and we bought a car from my sil. I couldn't feel the gas pedal so I use the left foot for brakes and the right for gas and watch my speed. I graduated in May 1998. Ralph kept getting jobs and laid off and getting frustrated with work. I started my own business for awhile but gave up because I got Social Security disability. I tutor during school and got paid until I got the disability. So I was stuck at home doing nothing. I had problems with my back and had test done and the doc found swelling in my spinal nerve. I went to a neuro surgeon and he couldn't do nothing so he sent me to a pain clinic. This started me on drugs which later a regretted. Joey kept having problems at school and Anthony did ok. They boy join Cub Scouts and Soccer. So we kept busy. Ralph help in Cub Scouts then in Boy Scouts until he got sick in 2002. Anthony quit boy scouts and decided to stick with hunting and Joey wanted to get his eagle. I also got them in Karate and they went up to Green Belt until Anthony decided to do High School Soccer and not karate. In 1999 Ralph started his own Construction business with a partner. We bought a living room suit and went more in debt. Mom wanted to go to Nevada to Family Reunion at her brothers. We hadn't been out there since she took us all on a plane when I was still in the Air Force. She had a RV so me, Joey,Anthoy, Mom, my three nieces,brother and grandma ( which I wish she stayed home). Loaded up and took off for three weeks. Mom was still working so we only had so much time. We enjoy the trip and stop at alot of places. Granny of course made a scene when she got sick and went into the hospital in Nevada. She was dehydrated. Which meant she was to lazy to get up to the bathroom so she didn't drink water or nothing else. So we push her to drink water and try to enjoy vacation. Ralph didn't tell me til I got home that business didn't work and his partner done him in. Well he started all over again by himself this time. Being in Debt was a problem for the rest of our life it seemed. Nothing really happen except I kept busy with the boys with afterschool activities. Ralph was sick alot and I took him to appt and while I waited I read the paper. There was an article about private christian schools in Monroe County. I read the article and knew what I had to do. I had mom call and get info and later that day went to see them and the next day I took joey down. With moms help we put him in a private school. The gave him a test and he tested 4th grade and he was suppose to be in 7th grade. Vonore school screwed up and wouldn't spend the time or money to help him. So I took him to school every day and pick him up. The school was in Madisonville about 15 mins from the house. Mom paid the tuition every month until I got more money from the VA. Believe it or not the cancer I had help me go up to 60% and I was happy because we got a back pay check. So things went pretty good. I had my cats and my family and no cancer anymore. When I graduated we did find a church close to home to go to and I end up teaching 6th and 7th graders in sunday school. I loved in and kept teaching until I got sick again which I will explain. For now I will stop. Next I will start around the year 2000. Thanks for listening Love Robin