I have had the worst insomnia for …
I have had the worst insomnia for a bout 2 weeks now. My nuerologist is even giving me a sleep study . I had it …
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Hey All
Well its been awhile since I wrote. Wednesday was a so so day I took a shower and went to the Sleep Study wed night. It went ok but my mask is making sore on my face. Wednesday at the sleep study I didn't sleep the best so Thursday I slept and made up for it. Thursday night I got a headache and still have one. Can't get rid of it. Friday was full of headache and homework. Had to make up for the class I missed and the Today I'm really sad Last night I found out a ds member died and it may have been overdose. She was a good friend of mine but was very suicidal and she promise she wouldn't do it but it go to much for her. She couldn't handle the finances and pain. She got 500 dollars a month for ssi and thats it. She had 13 cents for groceries after bills for this month. Can you imagine not having no food. I've never been that bad but I 've been bad enough that mom help us out many times.She said the state said she made to much money for help which I think sucks. She had a dog and a new cat she adore and now what will happen to them. I'm so upset that it really bothering me. I was suicidal once and I guess it brings back bad memories. She also had a bad childhood and was getting counceling. She didn't call Thursday night and her brother im me on friday night telling me she was dead. i talk to him and they don't know what happen to her yet. Life sucks sometimes. Well today I have a smile that she is with God and not suffering but the way she went made me sad. My friend that has cancer had biopsy and going to start treatments soon. Well that all I can say for now. How can I smile when so much is happening. We don't know when our time will come. I wrote about my dad in discussion board for school for a project in interpersonal communication class. It feels good to get it out. My dad disowns me, My dad in cananda dies,my friend dies and then my other friend has cancer.Geez God help me. Thanks for listening . Love ya all. Can I smile and feel sad to? I feel bad complaining because I know for a fact someone's got it worse but I just wanted to vent some thanks.
Robin
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You will be in my prayers!! I know it seems like you can't take anymore sorrow and pain but lean on the fact that God will not give you anymore that you can stand. God gives the most pain to his strongest children as they wear it with honor and will not stumble along the way!! God bless you!
angelndisguise
Robin,
You're going through a grieving process and that's perfectly normal. It always breaks my heart when I hear of someone committing suicide. 13 cents is pathetic and I truly don't know what to say there. Our system sucks big time.
I have a suggestion that will keep you busy but also may at some point in time help save a life. Learn about programs out there for medications, food pantries, indigent care, all the things that SSI or food stamps won't cover. IF any friend can see a ray of light at the end of the tunnel, they have hope.
I am so sorry to hear about your friend and my heart hurts for you. As you said though, there is comfort in knowing she's in a better place.
Some of us are just stronger than others and I try to keep on top of things in case I'm faced with this either in real life or on the forum. I want to be able to help in some way.
Gentle Hugs,
Dee
DDDnTN
I am so sorry my friend and just let me know if you want to talk because I am here for you
bdsurov
robin,i love you honey,please let me know if you need to talk,i'll give you my phone number,you can call me anytime.love and hugs,dawn
2boysmom
Youre entitled to feel bad for your situation even though other peoples problems may be worse. It is good to put things in perspective though and weigh thing out. But you are worthy also. So sorry to hear such bad news. You know there are lots of people in our own country that is hurting and they are very innocent in problems. They have no food and they aren't alcoholics or drug addicts. It seems like people with these addictions get more help and attention than people in general need.
You say your mask is bothering you. Tell the people who gave you that mask. Maybe it is missing something, like a cushion or a rubber cover. I do believe they have different styles of masks too. So ask them to see if there is another model for you.
lizgirl
Just cry when you have to and smile when you can. Time will heal your wounds. I have had a few wounds myself in the last month that i'm working on to heal. God grant us the strength to find happiness again. Hugs
stitch
Robin,
My blessing and prayers are with you, We are powerless over others and their decisions. All we can do is pray for them and turn them over to the care of God as we understand Him. We can do our best in helping others by sharing our expierience strength and hope with others, not all of them will get it, But doing the plating of the seeds God will water them if they have the willingness within themselves to change.
Blessings, Sheri K.
kariaba
Robin im so sorry for your loss.May god bless you in your time of need an there is nothing wrong with smiling when you can or crying when you want to.Love Sue
CrazySusie
So sorry to hear about your loss. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers..
sabercat
Prayers, be strong... Anna
gluzanna
Angelndisguise,
I think you have a lot of wisdom and put it very intuitively. I totally agree.............God doesn't give us more than we can bear, even when it seems like we can't. I am really sorry that such tragedy occur. I feel for you a lot, but as you said she is in a better place now........with her guardian angel and with God. I believe in the mercy of God which some may disagree with but I cannot imagine a loving God abandoning one of his own creations who was suffering.........God knows all and sees all and looks on the heart, always!! I have a relative who committed suicide because he was in so much physical pain he couldn't stand it anymore. I know God understood his anguish and his pain. more later............hang in there.............I love you!!! Dinner is calling..........I will be back online in a bit...........
BlueButterfly55
Robin I am so sorry for the loss of your friend like this. It seems at times that a cloud bursts over our heads when things just keep going wrong with the people in our lives. And you don't have to smile if you don't feel like it. Just let that damn of tears come out and ease some of that pain that you're carrying from all the loss in your life. It is not a wise thing to keep all of those feelings inside and bottled up. Sometimes when we don't know the words to say in a prayer to God, we just have to cry and He hears our tears because He looks at our broken hearts. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and all of those that are dear to you. I'm here if you need me hun. Love and Hugs, Debbie
FoggyMama
I am so sorry for the loss of your ds friend. It is so easy to get frustrated about our situatuions and not know which way to turn. It sounds like that may be what she did and she had so many of us friends here. She is with God now and all is well but she left so many people to miss her. Always remember that you have us to turn to. Love, Pam
PamelaE
Hugs I am sorry for you loss, let me know if we can help. I love you and here for you.
hopeisalive
hopeisalive
Oh Robin, I'm so very sorry for your loss...It is so hard when a friend or relative dies, especially by their own hand. You are in my thoughts and prayers, hon. Please let me know if there is anything I can do, ok? Love and gentle hugs to you, Kim XXOOXXOO
pomgirl
I'm thinking of you and feeling your lose. I am very sorry, though happy that you can still smile. You are an inspiration!
Hugs,Cindy
cgoverwhelmed
im pulling for you...hugs
mark
fate33
God will take care of her. Everyone goes through death at one point. Like when my aunt died suddenly.
martin234