Between me and my bf last night.
Brielle: hey wonderful 9:10 PM Kyle: hey beautiful Brielle: whhat's up? Kyle: nm, i was reading It …
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As you may know, my sister OD on Monday. I miss her. I keep thinking abvout her and what I could've done differently as a sister so she wouldn't have ever tried drugs in the first place. We used to be SO close!! It used to be we could talk about anything and everything and we'd hang out and do stuff; then one day that just stopped. Did I become to busy for her? Did I start spending too much time with Kyle? I was a lousy sister to her, I should've been there for her. I SHOULD'VE BEEN THERE!!! I miss her so much you guys, she was my little sister.
I should tell you that Kyle and I have decided to try for another baby. I want to be preganant, I want to have Kyle's child. I want this so badly. We;ve been making love quite a bit in an effort to get me pregnant, I hope it happens soon.
I'm a mess, I can't sleep and eating has become hard again. I am trying so hard to eat and not to cut. It's a disaster because I want to stop eating altogether and I desperately want to cut myself. I don't really know if my parents are all right or not because I haven't been home much, I was home the night it happened and mom dad and I cuddled on the couch in the living room and cried. I haven't been home since, I've been living with Kyle and it's just easier not to be home.
I miss Ashley.
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aww hun im so sorry 2 here bout ur sister...but u were not a lousy sister u tried 2 help her all u cud but she needed professional help...im thinking of u n if u ever need 2 tlk im here 4 u
take care n big hugs
sara xxxx
anon2
I am so sorry to hear about your sister. You tried to help her you are not a bad sister at all. Keep your strength. I am here for you if you ever need to talk!!!
~!~Love and Hugs~!~
bcsmith
I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. You and your family are in my prayers. I'm so proud of you trying to keep yourself on the right track from not cutting to trying to eat. You have so much strength and yet you are going through a hard time. God will make sure you get through this okay. I'm here if you ever need to talk sweetheart!
~Ashley
Rabbit11
Hi, I found out about your sister the other day from reading Kyle's journal, thinking about you both.
Having lived with an addict, I can tell you there's really nothing you can do to stop someone taking drugs, they have to want it for themselves. I know you tried your best, so don't blame yourself!
Phoenix07
It is not your fault this happened to your sister. There was probably nothing you could have done to change things. My younger sister and I were really close when we were young. We did everything together. One day we just started to grow apart. We got older and just didn't need each other anymore. Pheoenix is right, there is nothing you can do for a adict. My older sister was into drugs. There was nothing anyone could do to stop her.
I hope you can get pregnant again, but you are still young so there is time. Being a mother is so rewarding. I have 2 little girls. In a way I think that is might be better if you wait a little while. You are going through alot of grief right now with your cousins death and now your sisters. Stress causes miscarriages. When you do become pregnant again, I hope you will be able to eat and keep it down and you have to be ready for the weight gain because there is no way around that. I hated being pregnant. I couldn't wait for it to b over.
Just take care of yourself and I will be praying for you and your family while you go through this difficult time.
skinnygirl2525