Journal Entry for October 12, 2008
October 12, 2008 7:28pm
Set my feet... upon a rock
Set my mind... to things above
It's a new day
A new song.
Feeling free-er than ever. Last night …
Progress
70 %
RedSuze’s Profile
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RedSuze
is feeling OK
WHY CAN I STILL NOT UPLOAD VIDEO JOURNALS?!!!!
Recently: 9 journal comments, 8 hugs received more …
About Me
I have been suffering from bulimia since around the age of 16. It has been so long I don't even remember the trigger. It just grew and grew. But in the past 2 years I have managed to get onboard my road to recovery. It's a long one, and the root causes are coming to the surface. It's hard to bear sometimes, and I wonder where it will ever end, but every day is a step forward, every day is a day nearer recovery, no matter how hard it seems. I have recently given up my job and fought for NHS treatment, which I have managed to secure. I am now on a 20-week treatment programme of intensive CBT, travelling 360miles twice a week. I can't wait to get back to work and get on with a life free of this illness' stronghold.
Interests
Hiking and biking. Love it love it love it. Travelling with friends (always much more fun with your best friends), drinking wine, swimming (not at the same time), laughing, partying. I LOVE Al Murray's Happy Hour (TV show), even on the shittiest day that guy can make me laugh. I also adore the friends I have made here, they have given me my life back in abundance, and will continue to be a part of my life forever. Big kiss.
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Recent Activity
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Journal
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Struggling
October 11, 2008 4:07pm
Really struggling with anxiety and loneliness at the moment. I never knew what anxiety was until a few months ago, and now I wish I'd never found …
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Things you may not know about me...
October 5, 2008 12:00pm
1. I LOVE brown accessories. Earrings, necklaces, belts, handbags, shoes... you name it, if it's brown, I love it. But NOT brown clothes. No no …
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Journal Entry for September 27, 2008
September 27, 2008 11:09am
I have done a couple of video journals, yesterday, as I'm sick of my waffling self when I write in here. Unfortunately, it appears …
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Journal Entry for September 22, 2008
September 22, 2008 6:17pm
I have a few pm's to catch up on with some of you, and I will soon I promise. For now I really need to journal. Evenings and night-times are …
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Hugbook
Hug
Thanks for your kind words, you're absolutely right. I was being totally over sensitive about the whole thing and possibly whatever anybody had said to me at that precise moment in time I would've taken as a slight. My younger sister just had her first child by emergency c-section and he was injured during delivery, so I was already kind of stressed, without even realising it I guess. I've seen him now and although he's got an enormous black eye and a cut on his face, he's beautiful and so far seems to be doing pretty well. x
Hug
I am totally on your side with your post. Have time for a new friend?
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I’m With You
Don't let the turkeys get you down, beautiful! =)
Shout Out
You'll get there!
Hug
Sending you a message...
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Eating Disorders
Type: BulimiaFor about 5 years now I have been suffering from bulimia, slowly getting worse and worse. The last 3 and a half years have been horrible and 2 years ago I hit breaking point. It has been a long road to recovery but I finally feel like I am breaking free. I have managed to turn myself around, but now have intense ups and downs. I can't wait to be free of this completely.
Treatments
- Outpatient Treatment Program Too Soon to Tell
- I have just fought for and achieved placement on a 20-week intensive CBT programme. I am travelling 360miles twice a week, and I pray that this is the beginning of the end. :)
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- I had a couple of sessions of counselling. It helped me uncover some issues I have, but didn't really get to helping with the bulimia.
- Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked
- Every single important person to me in my life now knows about this and the support has been amazing. Sometimes it's hard to try to explain, but once people know they will do their utmost to give you the love you need when you need it, and the space when you don't.
Close Anxiety
Since suffering from binge-eating/bulimia for so long, social situations have come to make me extremely anxious. I have great difficulty in being around new people as I fear that they will find out what I do. I hate going out and if I meet someone new my heart starts pounding and I become fearful of everything that I say and do. I have also started to suffer from severe nightmares at least twice a week. I long for things to be back to the way they used to be a long time ago.
Treatments
- Breathing Exercises Somewhat Helpful
- Helps to keep me calm but doesn't stop the anxiety.
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Ultimately, I know nothing terrible will happen, it's just really exhausting trying to over-ride the negative thoughts constantly.
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Snapshot
Recently …
- 5 hugs given
- 8 hugs received
- 2 journal posts
- 1 discussion post
- 8 discussion replies
- 9 journal comments
- 1 photo comment
