Tobi2's Journal

I'm not concerned about finances or security.  I had just been hit with the info.  Jay crawled into bed with me and I felt like there were two losers laying around. 

I don't lay around long during the day, just long enough in the morning for my meds. to kick in.  When Jay is here I get out of my routine of taking my meds. first thing.  Anyone can see what a disaster I am without meds.

I'm not concerned with Jay and his job.  He has four jobs so dropping one may be a good thing for his sanity.  Plus his company is going to treat him very well money wise on his departure.  Yesterday, I was thinking of how I was totally screwed with my job.  The combination of all the above set me low-low.

I guess I also  realized he is going to be have the time to return to school to pursue his ministry studies.  I LOVE THE HOLY TRINITY WITH ALL OF MY HEART ABOVE ALL, but organized religion down here on earth makes my stomach turn.  We have been very fortunate to have a nice little church that we haven't had problems with.  My mental illness, interracial marriage, and lack of attendance will unfortunately affect Jay's future depending on assignments.

The last guy in charge saw our marriage as a plus because our denomination is starting to have mixed churches and would appreciate a mixed marriage.  This new guy is clearly uncomfortable around our marriage.  There was a large black church that requested my husband by name.  This man still refused to give the assignment to him.  God is always in control, hopefully this man will move on to bigger and better things.

I always wish my trouble makers to rise up to make room for my husband or defuse a problem.  This often happens.  I never wish someone down.  You can wish them up just as easy so a spot is created for you or your loved one.  If they are dirty, they will still fall from that higher spot.

Once when my husband was "paying his dues" at a low paying job but taking on more responsibility of the top man, I prayed for that man to get a better job offer.  Within a year he was offered a job with twice the amount of pay.  Hooray! it open up the spot for my husband who was then offered a job paying over twice his low paying job.  He was already doing most of the job.  We went from struggling to very comfortable over night.  Always pray for trouble makers to advance.  It is positive for you and your health and if they are horrible and on top they are easier spotted.