misshim's Journal

Just got home this afternoon from Atlanta (Suwanee) where it was girl's weekend for me, my sister , and two friends. We do this a couple times a year.

My sister lives in S Carolina, one friend lives here in Alabama, and the other friend lives in Ga , and that is where we always stay ... at her house in Ga because she is rich ... hahahaha !!!   She lives in a gated community where the homes start at 1.5 million , she some celebrity neighboors such as Ron White from The Blue Collar Comedy Tour ,  ... Javier Lopez (Atlanta Braves) , and lots other famous athletes .

Before you ask , NO , I did not go lurking in any neighboors yards at night ... wouldn't want the Homeowner's Association to throw my friend out of the neighboorhood !

We did the usual ... ate lots of chocolate , window shopped , girlie talk , and ate some more chocolate !  I had a pineapple upside down martini that was out of this world. Girls you have to try one if you get a chance !

Then Saturday night , we went to see the movie "Sex and the City". It was great !

On the ride home today I was thinking about my friends and what a wonderful time I had. I needed this weekend so much. I haven't laughed like that in a long time.

I also thought about my DS friends and how I couldn't wait to get on here and catch up on with everyone.

As I started getting closer to home it started to rain, and staring out the window, I missed Justin and started to cry.  I long to see him. I miss him so very much.

Thank you Lord for allowing me to laugh again this weekend.  Thank you for all my wonderful friends and family.  Please continue to stand by me and hold me up, even when I want to fall.  You know that when Justin left me , a part of me left too.

The pain is still suffocating to me. But you help me to breathe , and I thank you.

Justin,

I have missed you so much today. The pain has been so hard. Anna called, she was at the cemetery and couldn't remember exactly where you are buried. I was on the phone ... walking her over to your grave. She was always such a sweet girl ... your first true love. She has always said she would love you no matter what. I know she meant it.  You were trying to help her straighten her life up in the weeks before you left us.  Even after all you two had been through, you still wanted the very best for each other. Maybe that's what got me to crying on the way home.  You always had such a good heart. 

I know you can hear me and you see me hurting so much tonight.  Please send me something to let me know you are close. It's been a while since I've had a sign, or felt your presence close to me.   It's like I've lost you again.

I know you'll do it in your own time.  I love you , and I miss you so much. I wish you could be here.

Mom