Journal Entry for February 20, 2008
blah
is feeling OK
My mom was diognosed with MS a few years before I was born. My dad died 11 years ago from lung cancer. My mom's MS has gotten progressively worse and hasn't walked for 7 years. When I was 7 I started having gran mal Seziures and gained a lot of weight from my medication. I was evetually weened off the medication but, i already had the label of a fat kid.My mom married again so she could have someone to care for her. He was abusive and unfortunatly she still lives with him because she doesn't want to live in a nursing home. I went off to college and there isn't a day I don't think of what I'm putting my mom through by leaving her with him. I always told my mom that I could just live at home and go the the local college but we both know that It wouldn't work for me. I finally got enought courage to talk to someone my senior year of highschool but the councelors didn't take me seriously and i stoped going. I started using anti-depressants and I'm trying to turn my life into something possitive.
music, art, cloud watching, star gazing, having peaceful zen time to myself.
I've started a diet. Less crap more vitamins and things i actually need. I just need to start up my exercises and things like that. yay
I started cutting five years ago. It wasn't until last year i started getting help.
My mother has Progressive MS and I'm here to give her strength.
after starting treatment for depression I lost my ability to sleep.