You're not a weird freak you are a beautiful person and should always remember that and you should always remember that you are wanted here and that you do have a purpose in life as we all have a purpose the hard part if trying to figure out that purpose. If you feel lonely please get hold of me and we can go through it together.
Take care of yourself and I hope to hear back from you.
Sincerely Mitchell ( A friend ) xoxoxo
We've added new hugs! Send some love to your friends now! 
Discussion Topic
A feeling of "Aloneness" my whole life.
Posted on 07/16/08, 06:31 pm
Hi i'm Nita, 46 and divorced/widowed, 2 grown children. 2 breakups(actually i got dumped with no warning) in the past year. so hurt and sad when they happened. i had been with one guy for 7 years.
i grew up an only and a lonely, child. spent alot of time hiding in my room, and as a teenager, sitting in my refuge in my beanbag chair, headphones on, listening to loud music.
i still do that today sometimes...i think to just drown out the sadness.
i have never really felt that i was truly wanted in any group, such as at church and others i tried. i just feel so odd, like a misfit.
i was extremely shy and withdrawn as a child. my mama tried to encourage me to do things like girl scouts, sports...however, i was just too afraid.
It was like a part of me wanted to do these things, and another part was screaming "NO WAY"!!!!
Still today, i feel better and more relaxed if its just me and one or two other people.
I think i will go to my grave feeling like a weird freak.
i grew up an only and a lonely, child. spent alot of time hiding in my room, and as a teenager, sitting in my refuge in my beanbag chair, headphones on, listening to loud music.
i still do that today sometimes...i think to just drown out the sadness.
i have never really felt that i was truly wanted in any group, such as at church and others i tried. i just feel so odd, like a misfit.
i was extremely shy and withdrawn as a child. my mama tried to encourage me to do things like girl scouts, sports...however, i was just too afraid.
It was like a part of me wanted to do these things, and another part was screaming "NO WAY"!!!!
Still today, i feel better and more relaxed if its just me and one or two other people.
I think i will go to my grave feeling like a weird freak.
-
Reply #1 07/17/08 1:41am
-
Reply #2 07/18/08 11:53am
theres nothing wierd bout any of these feelings!! in fact i think they're perfectly normal. iv felt like that a large portion of my life, like im always the outsider lookin in and never actually part of anything. its good that uv ocme here cuz most of us r in the same boat and try to help each other. in "real life" i struggle to even talk to ppl and get so upset and anxious but on here iv found ppl how know how it feels to be pretty sh yand scared of rejection. i can be me instead of having to pretend to be someone else. i hope u find as many wonderfuul friends as i have as iv made a few really good ones.
ps mitchell is really good to talk to!! lol he's lovely and has a great outlook on stuff!! hey mitchell!! xoxox -
Reply #3 07/19/08 1:19am
Thank you Laura,
I must agree with Laura 100% not just about me ( lol ) but also about everything she has to say, She walked me through my dark times and made me come out smiling she is 1 in a 1,000,000 and not shy at all online and to be honest I don't think she'd be shy if I ever get to meet her, some day Laura I will come to Scotland and say hi then we can go out to the pub you, your mate and I also love to meet Erin seeing as I've heard so much about your angel I will have to bring my friend from Harrogate, North Yorkshire along to he's like a brother to me.
Well I could go on for days about this lovely Scottish Lass but It's getting late and I helped a friend on his house for 13 hours so I'm a little tired I hope you all take care and for Laura XOXOXOXOXOXO.
Sincerely Mitchell
-
Reply #4 07/22/08 5:00am
i know how you feel. i feel the same way i don't like groups of people and i don't go to partiea. i like it when its just one or two people i always feel hat no one really likes me they just want to use me i talk but i don't fel they are listening i feel stupid at times for feeling this way my sister tells me i'm a good person but i just don't seee it i have to have my music to get through the day i try to be alone but its hard when you have five kids anyway i'm here if you ever want to talk -
Reply #5 07/24/08 4:31pm
feels like i just talk too much at times, rambling on about things that don'e matter...blah, blah, blah...most of the time i just feel so stupid.
feels as if people are really laughing at me, while at the same time, they pretend to listen.
my daughter called me last night, and was outside using a weed eater while on the phone with me. i asked her to just call me when she can just listen and not be busy doing something else. feels as if i'm unimportant and not worth her attention. -
Reply #6 07/25/08 7:28pm
I can so relate to what your saying. It always amazes me on this site to find people who are describing my life. I feel like a freak too. I only feel comfortable around one, maybe two people...then it depends who they are. I also feel like I ramble on and on...then I worry later how what I said came across. Was I too blunt? Did I hurt their feelings maybe. I second guess everything I do. Well you don't have to feel alone anymore, we are all here. -
Reply #7 07/28/08 10:38am
i have that feeling too, like yr defective or something....but i guess others would see that and not think that at all... -
Reply #8 07/28/08 8:18pm
Hi Nita. I'm blu. I'm 18. I feel the same way. At night sometimes I cry just to hide my pain. I can't cry around my mom she'll think im weird. I can't cry around my friends because they'll think im being emotional or dramatic. I jus wish i had someone in my corner. My whole life I;ve felt alone and displaced. At my church they never promoted me to be a leader in the youth group. I don't know why. Some times with my friends, I feel displaced. I feel out of place with everyone really. Like I'm on the outside looking in. With boyfriends? never had a relationship that lasted more than 2 months. I've never been in love. recently(thurs) my b/f broke up with me. it lasted a month and three weeks basically. i thought he was the one. he wasnt. You have kids who love you unconditionally. I wish i had someone like that. i dont even believe my mom for a second when she says she loves me. I hope we can keep in touch and try to support each other -
Reply #9 07/30/08 6:53am
will appreciate anyone who can spend chatting with me. the nights are so lond and difficult without anyone to talk. i find chatting some one even online helps my panics. any age any color is most welcome. -
Reply #10 08/13/08 9:06pm
Hey woman! I have felt like you most of my life!
Welcome
Join This Group
A place where when you feel alone, you can retreat and perhaps find someone else who is feeling those same feelings, finding solitude and compassion.
