Angel125664

losing friends

Posted on 08/24/08, 07:20 pm

i've been going through a flare up for the past couple of months and even though i'm doing a lot better now health wise, i have lost almost all of my friends. has this happened to anyone else? it seems like a lack of understanding really came between us but i don't know...

• Reply #1 09/04/08  6:53pm
  
  droopie
  Yes it is hard for family and friends to realize just how hard this disease is, and they dont understand because they feel fine and though we may look fine , we are not. It is very difficult. MY best friend lives 900 miles away. I have known her since 1st grade and now we are in our 40's. I only get to see her about every 3 years or so. It is very hard. Even at church when you can be active and participate more when you feel well, they dont understand when you dont feel well and cant function at the same level. It is hard even for those who believe and worship Christ all the time. You just have to be your own best friend first.
• Reply #2 09/12/08  1:10pm
  
  bluecloud
  I have been blessed with good friends and family, but I do know people that have lost their friends....it is very tough. They don't understand and think you are just being lazy. Hang in there and your true friends will understand.
• Reply #3 09/17/08  1:32am
  
  aubleeanna
  I definitely know what you mean, Angel. When I was diagnosed with Lupus I was in a huge flare at the time. Despite me telling my friends what was going on, they simply got tired of it ... so did my husband. Well, my husband (ex now) didn't believe I had Lupus. He thought I was just being lazy. Sometimes, when I'm super tired, I will turn off the sound on my telephone and power off my cell phone ... let my machine pick up messages. I get a lot of hangup calls. I've found people don't want to deal with what interferes with their lives or causes inconveniences to them. Plus, they just plain get tired of asking you to do something with them and you refusing. Luckily, I have one good friend who understands completely. She's read the articles I printed up for her, understands when I'm in a flare at which time she does so much around my house ... I'd like to hire her as a housekeeper. LOL. She has taken me for tests, sat with me in doctor's offices, hugged me when I couldn't keep from crying my eyes out, etc. Okay, it's only one good friend, but I consider this one better than any of my other friends ever were.
  
  I'm sorry for your predicament. However, it's not unusual.
  
  I'm keeping you on my mind and in my heart.
  peace and love ... Kyle Anne
• Reply #4 11/17/08  1:50am
  
  dianeJ
  angel....I just had a falling out with a friendship that I have had since 1994, but lupus showed up in my life 5 years ago, diagnosed 3 years ago, started responding to meds pretty well a year ago....look for a topic with pretty much the same topic on the lupus. The answer is yes...unfortanately...If you can't find my story, let me know and I will email you a copy... Sorry you are having such a rough time! Keep your head up and keep taking care of yourself!
  
  Diane

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