Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal Thu, 04 Dec 2008 01:33:45 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/avatar/gallery/pinkflower.gif http://dailystrength.org/people/41358 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/460945 So, nothing is wrong with me. Apparently, according to my mom, the doctors are only convincing me that something is amiss. She says I'm fine. Then why don't I feel fine? I just wish she really knew me. I wish I could tell her everything that is going on. I wish she would take some time ... Tue, 18 Sep 2007 13:13:00 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/272682 Sorry it's been so long. I wish this was easier. I don't know why I make things so hard on myself. My parents told me that I'm severely self-destructive. What the hell?! Legion, my ball python, died when I was in the hospital. I feel like I'm peeling away from the world. And, it'... Tue, 03 Jul 2007 00:33:44 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/244337 Okay, I'm not sure where to start. I wasn't able to stay safe. I tried to overdose on my depakote.  Needless to say, it didn't work. I wound up in the hospital for about six days. It was a terrible experience. The hospital was okay, I suppose, as far as hospitals go. But the da... Wed, 20 Jun 2007 00:16:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/228766 i hate the world.....i'm so over this life....i wish eveyone would leave me alone Tue, 12 Jun 2007 23:55:16 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/224202 Holy hell, what a day. First, I ran my car into a ditch. It took twelve hillbillys and a dodge truck to get me out. I scratched my hand up pretty bad, other than that I'm fine and my car is fine. I had to call in to work, and I hope I'm not suspended for a week. I really hope I'm not sus... Mon, 11 Jun 2007 00:49:58 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/222218 So, I finally ate a meal and now I think I'm going to be sick. OMG- I'm going to be sick. My mom thinks something is wrong with me. And, maybe she's right. I don't know. I feel fine...great, actually. Super great. My mom took my credit card from me. Damn it. I had big plans for ... Sun, 10 Jun 2007 00:05:47 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/220533 I know I should be taking my meds, it's just that I keep forgetting them because I've been feeling so good. I did take them yesterday. I suppose I could attach it to writing here. I seem to write here nearly, if not every night, and I think that would be a good idea. I'm just afraid that... Sat, 09 Jun 2007 00:55:07 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/218485 OMG. I just had the best night with my boyfriend! We have this amazing connection. It really is absolutely amazing. I honestly don't think I've ever felt this way about a guy before. Maybe I'm completely crazy. I probably am, I always forget to take my damn meds. Crap, I'm going to d... Fri, 08 Jun 2007 02:15:02 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/216152 So, things are now good with my best friends and I. I sucked it up, called, and apologized for getting so angry. I know they meant well. I knew I would wind up doing that. Damn it. I haven't taken my Depakote for the past several days. And, I think it's affecting me. My mom says I've bee... Thu, 07 Jun 2007 00:23:21 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/215077 Well, my best friends are no longer my best friends! I swear to God, I hate them both right now. They just tried to do an "intervention" with me about the other night when I was with my boyfriend. This is the second time they've done that shit to me. The last time, though, it was ... Wed, 06 Jun 2007 15:31:26 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/213528 OMG WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME? You will never guess what I just did! Since you will never guess, I will tell you. I met this awesome super cute guy at work. He asked me if I wanted to hang out with him after work one night. I said, sure. He was nice and polite, I figured, why not? Well, wh... Tue, 05 Jun 2007 22:14:52 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/205320 Well, this is cool. My nickname at work is now Constantine. They call me that because I have the same tattoo from the movie Constantine. It is an awesome movie. My new pal, Legion, the awesome ball python, is doing well. He doesn't really do much other than lay around. He's curled up right n... Fri, 01 Jun 2007 19:37:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/203726  This is my new ball python, Legion! Woohoo!! I am so glad to have a snake again. YAY!!! I worked my first day at McDonald's yesterday. It was, honestly, hell. I put the burgers together and we were constantly being rushed. I bet we didn't go more than two minutes without an order.... Thu, 31 May 2007 23:32:35 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/197668 So, I'm going to fill out the paperwork for my new job today at four. I'm nervous and I'm not sure why. Tue, 29 May 2007 10:36:45 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/197060 Why am I suffering from the delusions still? They are delusions, right? At least, that's what me pdoc called them. I am starting to think that I am right. That my thoughts are not delusions as he calls them, but that they are real and not imagined in my mind.You see, I've been doing so well.... Tue, 29 May 2007 00:31:14 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/196451 Wow! So much has happened. I went for a job interview today and actually got the job!! Finally. I've been trying so hard for the past few weeks. Anyone's who's ready my journal entries knows that. I'm going to be working at McDonald's. Oh well. Fast food. Joy. At least it'll ... Mon, 28 May 2007 19:06:17 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/191307 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him. . ." -Romans 8:28 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither heigth nor depth, nor anything else in all creat... Fri, 25 May 2007 18:06:11 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/187630 I'm feeling a lot better. I like my new pdoc. I am going to see my therapist tomorrow. Something kinda scary happened. I explained my problems that I've been having to my new pdoc, and he raised my Abilify to help with my "delusional thinking." Just the word "delusional... Wed, 23 May 2007 23:30:46 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/183305 Okay, so I'm shocked. My mom actually apologized for upsetting me earlier. Wow. Mon, 21 May 2007 22:09:43 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/41358/journal/182777 I just had another fight with my mom. How does she always know how to upset me so much? Just over a stupid doctor's appointment. I felt like I needed to make an earlier appointment, but I wasn't going to. Then when my doctor called and asked if I wanted to make to earlier appointment, I thought, wow... Mon, 21 May 2007 17:50:51 +0100