Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal Mon, 08 Sep 2008 09:49:29 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/female.gif http://dailystrength.org/people/35768 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/1266107 I feel so overwhelmed.  i really am not sure if that's what it is.  i feel so many different things.  i am mad and sad and lonely.  I wonder if i could die from a broken heart?  I don't want comfort. i want to be alone.  i want him back, i need my David back. Tue, 26 Aug 2008 20:20:53 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/1102925 Trying to find a new normal for the girls.  It's weird, almost like pretending he's not here but will walk in at anytime.  I used to think "when we split up I will leave dishes overnight in sink if i was too tired to do them." He hated dishes left in sink, i had to do the... Thu, 05 Jun 2008 22:55:36 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/1065530 today just freakin sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My dad's wife called this morning and went to dial "D" for dad I hit Dave, when I heard his voice on the voice mail I lost it.!!!!!!!!!  I MISS HIM SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!  I JUST WANT HIM BACK!!!!!Everyone says "is there anythi... Tue, 20 May 2008 11:23:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/1057677 I FEEL LIKE CRAP!!! MY HUSBAND OF 17 1/2 YRS WAS TAKEN FROM ME.  I WOKE UP AND MY LIFE WAS TAKEN AWAY.  HE WAS MY SOUL MATE.  I FEEL NOTHING BUT SADDNESS. I WOKE UP AND MY WHOLE WORLD IS GONE.  NOTHING IS THE SAME.  I JUST DON'T COMPREHEND IT!! Fri, 16 May 2008 20:08:55 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/978928 Been a  long time since I've written.  I used to make time and now I just don't know where the time goes.  I survived my daughters cutting, another b-day w/ out mom, my daught sweet 16 w/out mom and my husbands mid life crisis.  I am still working on dealing with my ... Mon, 14 Apr 2008 18:29:08 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/771655   i replied to my own entry. what a dork.  i'll get it...I have lost over thirty pounds over tha last 3-4 months. I bought a treadmill and started to eat veggies instead of chips, cookies and doughnuts. Then all hell breaks lose cause of ensecure husband. I get upset at his stupid... Sun, 27 Jan 2008 00:21:28 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/699236 I can't beleive it's been so long since i've wrote in this journal.  I really haven't been doing much.  Trying to deal with my daughters and getting thru these holidays.  I thought it wouldn't be so hard. But again it was.  It's getting harder and harder t... Mon, 31 Dec 2007 16:21:50 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/459646 Hi, friends and members, i've been gone for a while... getting kids ready for school...i have also been remebering my mom taking us school shopping, realizing what a sacrifice she made for her 4 girls, who were so different.  She took us all to a different store for whatever style ot trend ... Mon, 17 Sep 2007 23:16:34 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/341506 I am freaking out. I have a ultrasound and mri scheduled for tomorrow of my rt breast. It was suppose to be just mri. I had an ultra sound which wasn't right that i was referred for an mri now last minute change. I'm scared.  I want my mom.I can't handle this stress it make me mad a... Wed, 01 Aug 2007 00:34:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/336232 I don't know what i'm doing wrong but my last entry is not posted.  I probably didn't save or whatever.  I also tried to ask qyuestions in cancer community and it didn't post either.  I am so frustrated.  I found a lump in my breast.  I had fibroids so i blew... Sun, 29 Jul 2007 22:00:00 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/228506 i am doing well today.  i am a little tired, my allergies have been a pain in the rear end.  i am dealing, it is also getting hot in chicago.  i so love the fall and winter.  every spring and summer i vow to move to alaska and i still want to move.  my sister came to town an... Tue, 12 Jun 2007 22:02:18 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/187176 I am feeling a litttle better today.  I was upset because of a woman whose daughter talks to mine is spreading "my business" in the street.  I am so not confrontational but i had to tell her to keep her mouth shut.  I felt guilty because i offended someone, but i did feel ki... Wed, 23 May 2007 19:47:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/185366 not any better. New problems ..i don't know why this guy puts his two sense in. I am so used to doing things myself that when he tries to do something it all goes to hell in a handbasket. Be careful what you wish for, you may just get it. that is so true,i thought i wanted his helping these girls... Tue, 22 May 2007 22:13:34 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/173680 AAAAHHHHH!!!!! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!! I hear my husband snoring... don't worry i'll get them showered and brushed and ready for bed then i'll make the lunches, i'll make sure homework was done and forms signed, don't worry then i'll try to shower and get my self ready. you just sleep and don't wor... Wed, 16 May 2007 21:53:36 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/160451 well it's 4 years today since my mom left. I went to the cemetery and it wasn't so bad. I think i kinda feel bad for not breaking down. I mean i am still sad and miss her so much but i am not totally devastated anymore. Is that wrong. I mean she will always be in my heart and thoughts. I try t... Wed, 09 May 2007 11:01:14 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/156131 Taday is an off day for me...i think it's hitting me that my mom won't be here for another mothers'day. I so thought i would be o.k. I even went shoppong with my girl's today. I bought myself a nano and i am putting music on it now, for our walk for breat cancer were doing on the 13th. I don't h... Sun, 06 May 2007 23:11:30 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/149940 still doing pretty good. i haven't had time to journal or read. Life is moving and i don't want to let it pass me up. Doing more stuff, visiting again. Trying to keep up with kids. I'm a little nervous cause mom's anniv. date is coming up. I took the day off work just in case. I feel o.k, i don't s... Wed, 02 May 2007 23:31:32 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/137865 i have been feeling weird lately. a good weird. kinda like a weight has been lifted. life isn't so cloudy anymore. but i kinda feel guilty, like i shouldn't be happy. i'm not sure why, i expressed to my sisters who said "mom would want you to be happy" and i think she would but how can i be happ... Wed, 25 Apr 2007 22:38:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/35768/journal/123406 today is an alright day--oh my gosh i read my last entry and i'm such a loser! i can't believe i get so bad. i don't know why...it's a little scary. I remember reading about bipolar disorder when my mom was diagnosed, maybe i need to be evaluated. i hate to tell people my feelings. i don't know... Tue, 17 Apr 2007 21:16:04 +0100