Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal Wed, 20 Aug 2008 23:41:22 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/avatar/248092/1213256693.jpg http://dailystrength.org/people/248092 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1085503 Well... I have not chased her for along time now. I have been strong and it has defo got easier. I am now at the stage that this week I have been able to (relativley)easily deal with writing her and beging to sort out the divorce. Events at the weekend also gave me a whole new outlook and for ... Thu, 29 May 2008 09:24:25 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1072528 Not sure how i feel today. Odd, as I am the only one who would know but true! I thought about her this morning as usual, but did not get overly upset. I have though about her through the day as well, but still not overly upset. Had coffee with a guy at work, who said he had seen her (as she wo... Fri, 23 May 2008 08:30:03 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1069846 I feel really odd today. I am still missing her like mad (I must sound like a stuck record now...!?!) I still love her and care for her so much. I am still so scared and can't shake the feeling that at some point in the future she will want to work on us, AFTER i have moved on and begun rebuildin... Thu, 22 May 2008 03:52:01 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1067395 Today is not such a bad day. The sun is shining, i took the motorbike to work and I have the afternoon off to pick my little girl up from school and then tea with her. Still a dull ache in the back ground, but not as bad as it has been for the past week or so. Got the long holiday weekend comi... Wed, 21 May 2008 03:39:58 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1065305 My wife left me. I admit it takes two to tango and we both had our faults, but at least i admitted mine straight up and tried to work on them and us. She did not try and decided instead to tell me its over, leave me and move back to her mums box room and start living life as a single woman again, ha... Tue, 20 May 2008 09:57:08 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1064785 So bad today. Missing her so much it is hurting me inside. I still love and care for her so much. It is tearing me apart to think of her with another man, she was (is) my wife and we had so much. She is so speacial to me yet she just walks away. Cant stop crying, just want it all to stop and en... Tue, 20 May 2008 02:42:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1062470 The pendulum must be on one of its 'up swings' today. Didnt feel to bad when i woke up (certainly not as bad as past 5 or 6 days anyway). Still mulling over stbx's last text, but put it down to her being lonely and needing to tell someone her nan is ill and dying. What annoys and upsets me is tha... Mon, 19 May 2008 05:22:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1060343 Well, I held of replying to her text yesterday evening. So difficult though.It gets me thingking - if i reply in a friendly manner, will she then begin talking to me and we can sort it out?  In reality i know what would happen - i would reply then she would ignore me and i would get wound up an... Sun, 18 May 2008 05:01:12 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1059225 I was feeling a bit better today - till stbx texted me. Why does care how i feel? Why does she care about my family, my family dogs or my daughter from a previous relationship? Why is she telling em about her nan being really ill? She left me and is activley looking for and seeing other men. Ju... Sat, 17 May 2008 15:12:48 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1058974 Feeling a little better today, thanks in no small part to the support i am getting from the group. I spent the night at my brothers, and this morning we spent 4 hours solid choping wood for his wood stove - sure is good to get that anger out!! Felt a little down coming back to the empty house t... Sat, 17 May 2008 12:22:03 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1055899 Today is bad again. I just can not stop thinking about her - why is that? She left me, she did not want to work on us or save us. She is the one advertising herself as 'single woman looking for men and relationsship'. I wish i could just get her out of my mind. Keep thinking she might contact me, ... Fri, 16 May 2008 03:12:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1053032 Well, yesterday was a real bad day for me, but today is a little better. I know she has gone and i know she is not coming back. I think it is made more difficult by the fact that during the first couple of months she kept me hanging on. Part of me wishes she had just cut all contact to start with. T... Thu, 15 May 2008 03:07:52 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/248092/journal/1051806 Really bad day.Woke up feeling so bad, missing her, even after 4 months.My head knows it is over, but my heart can not let go. I seem to hold onto this little bit of hope in my heart, that in the real world does not exist.    Wed, 14 May 2008 15:36:41 +0100