Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal Thu, 21 Aug 2008 20:33:41 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/avatar/244329/1213246946.jpg http://dailystrength.org/people/244329 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1150008 The last 3 nights I have got shit faced drunk. Blackout drunk and high. Today was suppose to be my quit day, but my roommate offered me to smoke weed and I couldnt resist. My old roommate just started dealing weed and is getting purple weed soon. I am planning on quitting after I buy an eigth of tho... Thu, 26 Jun 2008 19:51:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1140099 Last night I was blackout drunk...I was on pain pills, weed, and alcohol. I think i might have hurt my hand that I just had surgery on. I really want to quit. I have such a low self esteam right now...I have tried to quit so many times...I am going to try to man up and try again... Sun, 22 Jun 2008 17:18:53 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1123980 I got drunk last night and got into a fight with my x girlfriend. She wouldn't support me when I was drunk crying and beat the hell out of me....  :( We share the same room so it is hard. She just wanted to go to bed and not fight. I exploded and punched the wall and broke my hand. So far t... Sun, 15 Jun 2008 16:04:56 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1122719 Ok so I haven't relapsed yet, but I plan on it tonight.... Sat, 14 Jun 2008 22:44:55 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1116220 Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:26:35 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1116200 I smoked pot 2 days ago and it made me realize how much I don't want that drug. I asked myself how I ever got into it in the first place and actually hated it for once in my life!!! :) I needed this relapse! Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:22:16 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1116180 Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:09:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1116177 I came out to a bunch of my friends and they still love me!!! I feel like I can talk to alot of my friends about my issues!!! Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:08:11 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1116168 Today I woke up at 11 AM had breafast and started drinking. I know that is one of the most alcoholic things that i could do and I am ready to quit. The other day I smoked pot for the first time in 3 months. I wanted to not feel anything that I was dealing with. It turns out that it did not work at a... Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:05:10 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1115626 I am drunk. Don't know how to get back on track. I feel way too shitty to deal with anything. I just want to cover it up... Wed, 11 Jun 2008 17:32:00 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1097111 I relapsed Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:12:23 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1067007 Ha! 69! That number is still funny to me! Anyways...I am still sober but I don't know how because I haven't been going to meetings. I noticed that my thinking has completely reversed. I am very pessimistic and I have a negative attitute towards the meetings. My girlfriend has also noticed...... Tue, 20 May 2008 22:41:49 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1052555 Wed, 14 May 2008 21:59:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1052213 I am 63 days sober and my cravings are still strong but not as strong as they were in the beginning. I somehow find myself telling myself that it would be ok to go back to drugs and alcohol because I think that I can control it. I CAN'T CONTROL IT. No good will come from me doing drugs and alcoh... Wed, 14 May 2008 19:08:01 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1040680 Ok, so yesterday I received my 2 month key chain at Narcotics Anonymous for being 2 months clean. I know that I am not quite 2 months clean yet, but I went and got my keychain so I could show my mom, who lives four hours away from me, how sober I am. I am having a wonderful time being sobe... Fri, 09 May 2008 16:36:27 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/244329/journal/1040661 Today, I went to my first counseling appointment for my sexual abuse. I got alot of stuff off my chest and feel relieved. I still kind of feel shitty because it hasn't gone away. I know that it won't go away right away, but at least I am starting to feel better... Fri, 09 May 2008 16:27:36 +0100