http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal Sun, 06 Jul 2008 20:47:31 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.2.0.6584 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/avatar/180189/1213269017.jpg http://dailystrength.org/people/180189 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1171093 Well my husband finally called me today a couple hours ago. He says he is up north fishing with his buddies. Oh well must be nice to have a weekend trip and money in his pocket while I sit home with 21.00 in the bank! Must be nice to just disappear and not let anyone know where you are in case of em... Sun, 06 Jul 2008 18:42:45 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1170154 I really need to let go of the hope that my husband is ever going to change. He's so far into the drinking that it would take a miracle for that to happen. In his eyes he is just having fun so apparently he thinks the world is boring if he is not drinking.  I still wish I knew if there was ... Sun, 06 Jul 2008 08:13:37 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1169367 This emotional roller coaster thing is going to kill me one of these days. Why do I have to be the person with such a big heart? Why can't I be selfish and uncaring? I am slowly dying inside, I know everyone says it will get easier but I never was a patient person I don't know how long I can... Sat, 05 Jul 2008 20:13:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1167189 My therapist told me I should write in a journal more often to just get out my feelings. Ok so here I go.  Ever since June 8 when my husband told me he did not know if he wanted to be married or alone my world has been shattered.  he is depressed and an alcoholic and I am starting to belie... Fri, 04 Jul 2008 13:52:17 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1129515 Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:34:56 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1074459 I am writing tonight in the hopes that if something happens to me one day, the police will know to look to my husband.   Tonight was one of the worst times it has been with him drinking.  I was in bed almost asleep and he came home and started in on me.  Accusing me of things I d... Sat, 24 May 2008 03:08:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/1039004 Thu, 08 May 2008 22:51:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/899896 I told myself awhile back that I wasn't going to let my husbands drinking get to me anymore but it is so damn hard! He is such an awful person when he drinks, at least to me anyways. I'm sure he's fine with his bar buddies. I am the one who cares about him, not the people he drinks with so why am I... Fri, 14 Mar 2008 22:44:25 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/896851 Work is wearing me out, my husband's addiction wears me out, and our lack of finances wears me out.  I am tired of being the only one who seems to give a crap about anything around here.  I am sick and tired of living paycheck to paycheck and still can't get ahead.  It sucks w... Thu, 13 Mar 2008 19:10:41 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/896794 Thu, 13 Mar 2008 18:45:46 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/884964 The jerk finally showed up yesterday about 1/2 hour before we were supposed to meet his daughter and her boyfriend for the comedy show.  He was drunk and also coked up which is something he doesn't normally do.  Boy was I pissed!  The worst part is is he gets paid on saturdays and... Sun, 09 Mar 2008 09:12:42 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/883740 Shortly after I posted last night my husband calls on the phone and says what a screw up he is and he doesn't know how to stop being one, said he was sorry for making my life feel smaller than his, blah blah blah!  I think he was looking for sympathy because he screwed up again for the 4th ... Sat, 08 Mar 2008 17:12:52 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/882071 Well its Friday now, I did much better with my diet today than yesterday so that's a plus.  As for my husband, once again he is out drinking and here I am home alone.  This life is getting so pathetic I don't know how much longer I can stay here.  I need to hurry up and save u... Fri, 07 Mar 2008 22:08:07 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/879367 When I started Weight Watchers 2 1/2 weeks ago I promised myself I would succeed and stay motivated no matter what.  In the first 2 weeks I lost 6 pounds, I was very happy with myself. Now this week Monday my jerk of a husband and me got in a huge fight after he came home from drinking and its ... Thu, 06 Mar 2008 21:18:34 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/180189/journal/825999 Well, tomorrow is my big day!  I will be doing my first weigh-in at 6:30 a.m.  I hope I can stick to it this time.  I know it will be hard because I am an emotional eater and tend to binge at times.  There is alot of stress in my life right now so It is not going to be easy at fi... Fri, 15 Feb 2008 20:57:24 +0100