Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal Sat, 06 Sep 2008 23:44:19 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/female.gif http://dailystrength.org/people/152854 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/698283 Bad day.  Hurting all over and it is my son's birthday.  Mentally I am not in control of myself.  I can't write about it right now but its related to Kelly's suicide and the fact that he wasted a healthy body and I am stuck in this broken one.  Passed blood this morni... Mon, 31 Dec 2007 08:40:30 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/697025 OMG OMG OMG... we have company coming. I've got this really weird thing about people seeing my house a mess and my son invited his friends over tomorrow.  OK, its Jeff's birthday and that's cool but the house is not as clean as I would like.  It's not actually dirty.... Sun, 30 Dec 2007 17:51:45 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/696645 Well, its 2:30 and I'm here finally. Poor journal, you probably feel deserted. Lets see what have I done today.  I went to the store and answered messages.  The messages were a really uplifting thing and put a smile on my face.  The store wasn't so great.  I ran into... Sun, 30 Dec 2007 14:49:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/693924 OK I'm here and I'm breathing.  Thats it LOL Actually I have to do things today and I have no energy to do it.  Youngest sons bday is the 31st and today we go to Sams to pick up supplies.  I am feeling better (theroretically) but have no energy.  The reason I say the... Sat, 29 Dec 2007 09:21:23 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/693078 Maybe Snoozy is right. I don’t know if I will leave this open for people to read or not. Its kind of a private thing. Funny I can daily post info on my bowel movements and not think about it because it is part of the illness but I cannot feel comfortable talking about my emotions. I guess I ha... Fri, 28 Dec 2007 21:20:57 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/689722 Well I will sleep tonight no matter how my legs feel.  I got about 3 hours total last night counting the time I was asleep on the sofa. I went to the shrink this morning.  Sandi is a nice girl and easy to talk to so it helped.  I dumped a lot of ugly emotions.  The stuf... Thu, 27 Dec 2007 13:19:16 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/687053 I am going to call the rhuems office as soon as it opens.  Colin keeps telling me I am more swollen up than I realise.  I do look awful that is for sure.  My face is so swollen from water retention that I look like I weight far more than I do.  My legs feel tight and have a numbi... Wed, 26 Dec 2007 08:59:05 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/685460 Trying to act like I feel good for Colin and the kids.  Tired and weak but not as bad as before.  This is a miserable excuse for a holiday and it is my fault.  I would like to know how I am not supposed to feel depressed.On the bright side, I am sure i do not have crohn's.... Tue, 25 Dec 2007 09:51:34 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/683665 I blocked my journal for the last two days because I wasn't fit to be around.  No point in spreading my bad mood.The reducing doses of prednisone seems to be returning me to my normal state with an added bit of kick.  That is good because it gives proof that it was working to some degr... Mon, 24 Dec 2007 09:44:34 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/679431 Doing ok this morning.  My foot itches like crazy and my face is burning but other than that I am feeling good.  That is really weird because I should be a mess right now.  For me PMS means major bowel issues yet all I have had is pain and urgency.  The BMs look normal not bloody... Sat, 22 Dec 2007 10:11:29 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/677167 I have been up half the night with joint pains but for once I am actually not sleepy.  Slightly foggy and a nasty taste in my mouth but that is about it. I'm trying to get a grip on what the doctor said yesterday.  How big of a deal is it that some of my symptoms are atypical?... Fri, 21 Dec 2007 10:17:45 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/675657 Well that went fast.  Brief euphoria then flat on my back.  So much for the candle making, I am phoning it in on the cell.  James calls every few minutes to ask for instructions.  Yep, this is REALLY going to get me off disability. I am so frustrated.  I was doing ok bu... Thu, 20 Dec 2007 18:30:47 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/675251 Back home now and beat.  The visit to Bayliss was very productive.  He will treat me so now I have a rhuem of my own.  (sorry bad puns are a weakness of mine)  I am so grateful because the idea of driving to Richmond or UVA every time things acted up seemed horrible.  He is ... Thu, 20 Dec 2007 15:18:48 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/672932 I am in a weird mood today.  Too many things at one time. On the supposedly bright side the candle business is doing well with the holidays.  Only it is doing great without me.  It was my idea.  I designed the products, set up the website, made all the decisions when I was s... Wed, 19 Dec 2007 15:45:19 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/670760 Better today, I really did melt down last night.  I dropped the prednisone to 40mg this morning and will take an additional 20mg tonight if I need it badly.  Tomorrow I will try to do 20mg in the AM and another 20mg in the afternoon.  I will stay there for a week and see what hap... Tue, 18 Dec 2007 16:35:20 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/667661 OK, its doctor day and time to do battle.  I am not going to spend 4 hours driving back and forth for nothing. I am still in a flare so that is good (well in a really bad way)  I am hoping he will ok me for 20mg extra in the evening because I can tell when the prednisone starts to wea... Mon, 17 Dec 2007 09:30:12 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/665657 Its Sunday and I am missing Mass again. I will speak to Father Joe later in the week to see if he can recommend some appropriate reading material. I am trying not to let myself get down but I am not sure why God has chosen for me to get lupus. I know everything in life has value, even this, but righ... Sun, 16 Dec 2007 09:41:52 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/663862 OK it is 8:30 in the morning now and I have slept straight through since my last journal entry.  No bloody stool at the moment but my lower digestive system is RAW.  Violent diarrhea with lots of blood in it last night.  I am used to some bleeding but that was frightening.  The r... Sat, 15 Dec 2007 09:03:52 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/152854/journal/662653 Symptoms at 4pm.  Passing lots of blood, abdominal pain is bad... sharp cramps with a dull ache in the back ground, dizzy and keep falling, muscles weak, head is hurting badly, butterfly rash, pains in joints and muscles, pins and needles sensation all over, chest hurts and it is hard to get my... Fri, 14 Dec 2007 16:23:43 +0100