Keep a personal wellness journal on DailyStrength to track your health and communicate with friends. http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal Fri, 05 Sep 2008 08:48:39 +0100 DailyStrength RSS 0.11.3.0.6833 (FeedCreator 1.7.2) http://dailystrength.org/images/comprofiler/avatar/142030/1213248123.jpg http://dailystrength.org/people/142030 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/1157097 not really ok all..just surviving all...ttys Mon, 30 Jun 2008 08:11:54 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/1058348 its either crps..cancer....or major infection...he doesnt know....running bunch of scans.....n the treatments are probably going to kill me..just what 3 docters told me...so im just getting my afairs in line......=( atleast if its cancer its semi treatable..same for infection..crps im just fucked Sat, 17 May 2008 03:21:15 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/1050662 sorry i havent posted in a while..been too sick n havent felt up to it..been back in the hospital multiple times and well.todays the big day i find out about my amputations from my main surgeon....if he says no it wil lbe a bad day......if he says yes and my insurance says no it will be a semi bad d... Wed, 14 May 2008 04:58:35 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/999071 havent posted in a while but im still here.... may14th cant come soon enuf...meeting with hanger and my CP speicalist/orthopedic surgeon docter to talk about surgery..ive been sick in n out of hospital....n the meds are rippin me apart...i just dont know anymore... Tue, 22 Apr 2008 16:50:20 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/932963 i have my computers n stuff back....n im running a fundraiser to help with either buying prosthetics and or the surgery to cover whatever the insuranaces wont...weather its meds, legs,,or the surgery....anyways i been going to hanger and there gunna go with me to my next docters appointment with my ... Fri, 28 Mar 2008 01:58:28 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/909971 the pain is still so strong i wana give up...my aid has my computer(s) still hes returned most if not all of my clothes..but none of my money..i just feel like giving up.....none of my meds are working,,,my sleep schedual is all fucked up..i dont know i cant go on much more...i need friends n help..... Wed, 19 Mar 2008 02:00:31 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/899826 the reason i havent been on is i overdosed on vicodin, morphine, percocet, valium, ativan and some other drugs cuz i just wanted 1 pain free night...wound up in ICU...coma..intibated for while..then was in ICU for week...then normal hsopital for week...then considered amputations for week..and got a... Fri, 14 Mar 2008 22:06:01 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/855258 I have a PPIC line now...and there gunna send a pain managment specialist n some other stuff....wont do the amputations..but i dono i dont wana go home..im scared...really scared :'( i fucking hate this docter..same 1 ive had b4....i really feel like giivng up...if they dont discharge me with ad... Tue, 26 Feb 2008 20:37:16 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/854529 so there gunna install a PIC line install n then maybe do the amputations if i can convince them ..hoping i can...if not i could use an advoacte..any1 wana help msg me...  Tue, 26 Feb 2008 15:40:21 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/852947 back in hospital inpatient again....antibiotic and pain theraptys...been in since sundsu ttykll...need 2 sleep...hugs Tue, 26 Feb 2008 01:18:47 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/844972 sitting in hospital bed in diapers with IV wiaiting for discharge....they got rid of most of the infections....rest of the rxs should take care of it...and dr wrote surgery referal..so im feeling kinda happy....just miss all of u...hope all is well with everyone,,,still suicidle..if the meds n surge... Fri, 22 Feb 2008 22:18:45 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/844143 it has recently come to my attention some members think im an attention whore or a fakeor dont understand how i can be gay because of my past...im not an attention whore and i am gay..being gay doesnt imply i have sex(I cant cuz most of the time its bleeding or infected or has a cath in it).....AND ... Fri, 22 Feb 2008 16:10:46 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/832365 wound up in the ER last night...bacterial and fungal infections a many, vancomycin and levaquin...had to remove my cath in bathtub b4 we left cuz for 2x today the cath wasn flowing righ t n backed up n made pressure n then piss bypassed it causing extream pain..well i found out why...it was majorly ... Mon, 18 Feb 2008 13:42:59 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/830985 slept all day n then got up..got on secondlife(secondlife.com for more details) n then typin this...thinking im gettin a cold...meds not working still...almost drown in the tub yesterday morning when i blacked out n went into flashbacks...caretaker was there tho...otherwise i woulda died...n last ni... Sun, 17 Feb 2008 23:36:26 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/820271 the morphine n percocet dont work...atleast not unless they at high high doses..n then i need zofran..which i dotn have.....the puking n siezures been getting alot worse....havent been round..been stayin at new caretakers house more...hes helped get my SSI bumped up n some other stuff...he promises ... Wed, 13 Feb 2008 20:24:42 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/801058 ~!just when i thought shit couldnt get any more f'd up..it happens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~ Uhm..Yeah...my home health care was terminated because i got on CCS(California CHildrens Services) which in of itself would be a good thing if it didnt mean i had to change docters and start almost e... Wed, 06 Feb 2008 17:02:26 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/798898 I hate it....the cath..being sick..the pain...being human..being alive...everything...cept for my derek n jake n nate n my friends....i just cant take ne more...schedualed some more appointments..now i get to wait for more bad news...can allready tell the antibiotic n antifungal im on now arent work... Tue, 05 Feb 2008 21:42:27 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/796441 6 days to goto my birthday...wonder if i should make it my death date too...tiz just a message to let you know im still alive..sort of... Tue, 05 Feb 2008 01:27:28 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/789878 im sorry...got really bad news today.they dont have enuf info to process the surgery referal...plus some other bad stuff..like none of my pain meds working..my insurance being maxed out every month...n not bein able to see my boyfriend n his brother n bf......n everything else.....if you dont see ne... Sat, 02 Feb 2008 15:17:03 +0100 http://dailystrength.org/people/142030/journal/788497 sorry cant respond to the hugs n messages much..just too nausious..sick..tired..hurting....im really sorry..i wana respond..just..cant right now...maybe when im feelin better..thanks every1 for standin by me Fri, 01 Feb 2008 23:06:39 +0100