Shyness Support Group

The only thing I can think of is to try and breathe evenly and just do your best to remain calm and just focus on talking.

I think it's all about pushing yourself. I know where you're coming from, I always feel awkward when I'm with a group of people I don't know...what I do is set small goals for myself, I tell myself the next time I'm in a group setting I'll add one comment to the conversation. The next time...maybe 2 comments or opinions. When I reach my little goals I feel better b/c I accomplished something, albeit a small accomplishment, but just shows that I'm progressing. I also reward myself :) "I added to a conversation today, I deserve a chocolate bar" lol and little by little...b/c I spoke up, people started to get to know me and I made friends.
I think shy people never really lose their shyness, they just get used to dealing with different situations better. Years ago I asked my guitar teacher how he got over his stage fright when performing (he had been performing for more than 35 years) and he said that he never really got over it, he still gets nervous...it's just about practicing, and pushing yourself. No one is perfect, so try not to think that people will be critical of you.
I liked his advice. I'm still working on all that of course :)

Hello and yes I know the feeling, freezing up when you walk in to a group in a bar or club or anywhere, i think it's because they instantly ignore you and don't make you feel welcome and the reaction you expected didn't happen, there's nothing worse than when you meet knew people and all they do is ignore you, it's happened to me so many times, don't let them ruin it for you move away from them and try to make people see you, smile or just say Hi, but if they don't talk to you there not worth bothering with if they are going to be genuine friends that you have not met before they should talk to you and not you talk to them, I know exactly what you mean, just separate your self from everyone take some deep breathes and say to your self write I'm going to have a good time who is looking at me or who can see me standing here, and when they do act on that, but remember if they don't react back then look around you, who smiles at you or realizes that you are lonely and standing there with no one to talk to and makes an effort to make you feel welcome, make them see you and if they don't then look elsewhere, good friends are hard to find, but all I know is bad friends ignore you and good friends will talk and make you feel welcome, believe me I know, let me know how you get on my name is Martin. X

You dont stop being shy you cope and manage it. I do it by massive over compensation.

I don't think you ever stop being shy either, a therapist told me to desensytise myself from feeling shy around groups by forcing myself to be around groups of people as much as possible. It did help but it took a while and if I stop going to meetings for a while I get nervous all over again. I belong to Alanon I've been going for about 4 years and I still find it hard to talk at meetings but I have made some friends. (baby steps)

It actually took me a while, well most of my life, to realize that being shy isn't something that needs to be fixed. It's the insecurity and anxiety that need to be tended to. Have you sought any kind of therapy? It really does help, it's really scary going for the first few times, but if you're comfortable with the therapist, things happen gradually and you'll start to heal. I was in your position not too long ago and now I'm sitting in on meetings at work for hours with out the jitters.

Good luck, keep in touch.