Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Support Group

Hi Symphase, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I remember for the first few months, I actualy heard my ex outside shooting. Just out of the blue. I knew he was there and going to kill me. I would call my pastors wife. She would tell me He's NOT there! Robin HE S NOT THERE! I remember I felt so foolish, like she didn't understand. I would realise he really wasn't there while I still heard it. I was very confused. That was seven yrs ago. This yr I actualy went to our church's firework display. My tick came back right in the middle of it, and my left shoulder was jumping back at every pop and boom. It was kind of funny but I was embarrassed too. I guess I'm better but I realised I am still punchy or whatever you call it. I was over excited, full of sugar and caffein and I think I was acting wierd lol. I had just come out of a bad crying jag from not being able to go to church that morning, because I knew I could not sit through the honoring of the vets they were having that morning. I lost a brother in Vietnam. I was trying to make myself go and having anxiety all week. I posted sat night and I was a mess. Angry and hurt. I may make it public and share it. I don't know. Anyway, I'm sorry you still trigger. It's been a long time for you. I still trigger from childhood stuff too. I pray you're better now. Hope my sharing isn't selfish. Thanks for listening to me too. Blessings

Getting over it isn't an option. Shame on anyone who says that to you. You have to reprocess the event to relieve yourself of the trigger. In my case - My mother died on St' Patricks day. I fantasized for years about killing her, wanting my pain to stop. You have to know I wanted it to happen so bad that the guilt has tortured me. Unable to forgive her, I was unable to forgive me. Treatments (emdr) have lessened the pain a great deal. I no longer have the nightmares, I don't fantasize about digging her up and stabbing her and her death no longer feels like my fault. Ironically, my spititual life grew out of the chaos. Years later we sponsored a child in another country only to discover her birthday was mar 17th. That date went from horror to elation.

I'm sorry for not posting this last night, but just in case there are any July 5th fireworks that you'll have to deal with here's my suggestion.

MUSIC! When I'm feeling like you describe, I plug my iPod into my ears and turn up the music. It blocks out all other sounds and I can focus on the words of the songs.

Also, I sleep with earplugs ... since every little noise wakes me up. You might want to grab a pair of those too.

Music, listened to through headphones (or my preference earbuds) is the best.

Wishing you peace and healing.

Hi Sym,

I hope you're feeling better this morning. I'm sorry you went through that last night. It sucks to think you can handle a trigger then have it hurt like that after all. Would you feel more comfortable next year if you spent it with friends, or had a friend over to your house to watch loud movies?

Hugs to you for making it through.
Wistala

I have same problem. Huge trigger. For me I was trapped in my car while it was burning all around me.( l was lucky only one small burn on my leg, my ashma being fubar and got sick from it ) My ex had poked a hole in the fuel line cause he know I was fleeing the state to get away from him. I got it service head to toe for the trip ( 1500 miles ), packed up the car went to bed. Several times that night I had neighbors telling me he was messing with the car, even got in it, called cops over and over. Next morning he calls and leaves a message " you will BURN if you try to leave " I took off to pick up a small trailor, noticed the drivers side wouldn't open. Saw when I crawled in the the door had the inside door all unscewed you couldn' get to the handle to open it. Also had an empty large can of lysol. I was gonna leave not let that stop me, i only got a few miles..My car started smoking so I started to pull of into highway median, in wall to wall stopped traffic. The fire spread and grew so quick, I had flames inside the car very fast. pasenger side on fire,dashboard on fire, I was tapping outthe floor with my fet trying to get my door open, finally someone stopped and pulled on that door till it opened and got me out.he slammed the dorr shut because of flames. We got behind the car just as fire crew showed up. The smell, the smoke was awfull. My keys to my house where irretrivable ( they melted ) and the tires started blowing out one by one BANG BANG BANG BANG, then a huge bang as the windows blew. All I hear was popping and banging. I go though that just hearing seeing or smelling fireworks or fire.
The music to block it out is a good idea,just plan on being up late. I wish I could tell you how to solve it, but I havn't figured it out myself. Just know you are not alone in that fear. Hang in there. Msg me if you need to talk.
Hugs and prayers
Nikki

helicopters make me freak, i kind of tremble and feel sick and so do some fireworks.

O man I had to close my ears for the fireworks.. I was imagining gunshots in the war.. and all the horror that comes with it.