Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Not to offend you or anyone else but sometimes there are things that just need to be said privatly for the sole purpose of the persons own feelings and sense of privacy. I mean sometimes some things are better left unsaid publicly. It brings the friends here to gether closer and more intimate in being able to dish out their most private of feelings with someone else who is dealing with the same problem as they are and also know them more intimatly and the problem they are having. I know that and I have been on DS for over a year now (whoo hoo do I get a 1 year chip??? now now stop applauding) and I have got some very close friends that have been with me through just about everything. And sometimes on the forums I like to share things with others or feelings with others that I jsut dont get the right response, especially lately. Because they do not know me as well and do not know what I have been through. And there are also ssome that are angry too and are not able to express things as well too. But I still go on these forums because it is therpy for myself as well to vent out to the others what I have and did go through and sometimes that can be a help for others. I also reply to a great deal of topics also because of what I have been through and my educational background helps me see things more clearly too.

But anyway that is why some people talk privatly amongst themselves to get a closer and tighter bond between the two and to be able to talk more freely. because as I was scolded in one of my topics that the other person responded completly wrong, DS is not a private web site and you have to be careful what you vent on. And that is just what we are doing, being careful because we have had to do it throughout our relationships and right now some just have to be careful and feel the sense of security through private messages.

I disagree.. I see this forum as a help line.. if you want help.. the open forum is where you should seek it.. private messages only give you one point of view. Just my opinion for what it's worth

I know a lot of people don't feel comfortable talking or posting because they are still afraid of their ex's finding out or finding them... I know my ex found this site. Its searchable through google.

My group is very supportive for those who wish to have some real support. I have also created a private site for us to chat in a safe forum where only Ds members can talk about some real issues without fear of being found by their stalkers.

Feel free to join:

http://dailystrength.org/groups/ph...

Also our group has a chatroom so we can get immediate support, especially when having flashbacks or something that needs attention and support of others right away.

Upstate I agree with you that talking privatly helps us to get to know each other better, and some of us just feel safer not posting 'publically' on the main board.

Is being cautious and diligent about one's personal business a form of hiding? I personally don't think so. I am glad this site offers choices.

I agree susan not everything needs to be made public especially with abuse and trauma.

The point of this board/forum is to pose questions. The form of the answer should not matter if it is recieved via email/hugs/journal entry post/or the main board.

i think it is ok to talk with someone privately and ok to post on here.

I'm not sure what type of pms you are getting, but my experience is that people post publically things that they would want to share with the world, and privately when they feel the topic is, well, private. Most of my communication is on the public boards, but there has been times when people have used pm to respond because they didn't understand my post and didn't want to appear unsupportive in public. Others wanted to share with me something they didn't feel comfortable sharing in public.

DS has a lot of tools for people to use in whatever way that they feel the best. There are journals that can be public or private, hugs and discussion boards that are totally public and pms which are private. Each should use which ever form of communication that they feel most comfortable.

You all make good points, especially rubyMcC.. if you're afraid of your man finding you, public posting is risky.

What I'm talking about really is someone who needs help, you have to agree that if you need help, the more people you let see your post the more there are to help you.

I'm sorry if I offended anyone.