Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) or is unlawful or wrongful....
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missing the nastiness!!!!
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Isn't it strange. I haven't heard from my partner (who was very abusive) for several days now. I usually get nasty text messages. And I'm missing it and feeling really lonely. I realise how utterly stupid that sounds and can't understand it myself. I should be glad of no contact, shouldn't I????
Posted on 03/12/08, 10:03 am |
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I guess some how its the contact you miss.. thinking even though its nasty he's still talking to you. And somehow we like to twist that he might be talking nasty but its only because he loves us.. You cant have hate with out love right?? Trust me.. you wont miss it much longer. Once you get a taste of what real love is.. you'll never miss the nastiness again.. God bless. 
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If you are used to being treated this way it makes sense that you are missing his behavior. You know in your head that it is wrong for him to treat you badly but your heart misses being with what you are used to.
We all tend to go back to what we know because the unknown is so frightening. At least with the abusive partner you know what to expect, or you know to expect unpredictable behavior from him. Hang in there, find something to keep your mind happily occupied. Start to surround yourself with healthy people who will treat you with respect. Tell yourself every day that you DESERVE to live a life in which no one is abusing you. Allow yourself to find pleasure in peaceful times and reject turmoil for the time being. Good luck and don't forget to "just breathe".
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I sort of can relate to that. I had post traumatic symdrome and when i was separated from my abusing husband i would freak out, it was what i wanted, but at the same time it wasnt.
in my mind if i didnt know where he was, i would be even more scared, than when he was around me, only because i didnt want a surprise attack, i wanted to be in control. feeling lonely and missing him, i think can be quite normal sometimes. as my life had been living on adrenalin, everything else normal seemed boring. until i had been away from him for a couple of years i am now totally happy dont doubt and question your feelings of lonliness because this is what you are genuinally feeling now, and thats okay.. but ask yourself do you want a relationship of unhappiness and misery, when it is so so possiblt to find a caring partner who will love and adore you, aim for that
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Maybe you love him or just got used to the abuse, give it time. No one deserves to be abused, no way.
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